Stay at Home Dads

[T3hSarah]

My husband was a SAHD for awhile, I felt like it ended up just being loads more work for me. House was a mess, kids were into everything, he sat and played video games all day. He kind of checked out really, so got him back working and he became a more involved parent again.

[AllofFive19]

I loved when DH was a SAHD. He did and the kids as well.

[LiveWhatULove]

Although I can appreciate the idealist idea that humans are humans & gender roles have now reached equal status in our society. But in reality, both research as well as anecdotal reports highlight that women are still bearing the weight of child rearing. For 20 years, my DH (who, before I make sound like a knuckle dragging ass, really is a funny, intelligent, compassionate individual who adores me & our family) was raised in a home where his father worked 80 hours a week and his mother was responsible for child rearing. As the baby of the family, he was not expected to be around or help with infants or toddlers. It was not a role he understood nor one that he had observed any other male doing. It did not feel natural and he fully admits, he didn't even really feel "attached" to the children until he could clearly converse with them.

You could argue he was smart enough to learn 24-7-365 infant, toddler & pre-school care, and he was. Had we no other options, the children would have been safe with him. But with that said, the monotonous job of reading the same books, engaging in the smae learning development activities, cooking the same meals, attending the same play groups, working on the same arts & crafts, etc. would have been mind-numbing and very mentally unhealthy for my husband who is creative and loves leadership roles in the business environment. There would have been a lot of screen time for the children, while he just focused on "surviving", lol.

My family, my children benefit from a solid daycare curriculum, higher socioeconomic status from 2 incomes, and happy professional parents. But I understand all families are different and our life is not one that all families would desire.

We were established and in our 30's when we became parents, I am not sure if you consider that old or not?

Why don't you think your husband would do well in that role? Is he older or something?

I actually don’t really “know” any stay at home parent in general. I mean I hear my children say, “j’s mom doesn’t work” but I do not know these people. My feelings have softened and faded regarding the topic over the years.

My DH would not do well in such a role, so I would immediately think, the guy is quite different than my DH or myself for that matter.

But as demographics change and more women than men are getting college and graduate degrees, I suspect it will become a much more common phenomenon as it will make economical sense.

[Pjmm]

My ex did it for a while when he was unemployed. Honestly I think he was depressed. He didn't do anything and it led to a lot of trouble between us. Some men can be sahds but my ex wasn't one of them.

[Rebeccaraev2]

That's cool! Did he enjoy it? What it his first time taking care of a newborn?

My husband was until recently. I just didn’t want my newborn daughter in daycares or with strangers and I made significantly more than he. Now that we live near family, they watch her for money and we both work again.

Nope, we’ve had other kiddos. He enjoyed it though, he was really great at everything but cooking so we used the crockpot on my work days, ha! If he wants to again, he’s more than welcome to.

[mrsmacgiver]

When I was teaching, I worked 60+ hours a week and my husband worked from home. We did and still do have a separation of labor but at that time, he was holding up the household in a lot of ways. Our roles have changed now that we both work from home.

I think he would be a wonderful SAHD but I also think he would always have some sort of a career. We're alike in that way.

[deltathree]

My doctor's husband stays home with the kids. She admits it's much better that way