Not sure if this is sexual abuse or not? (Trigger possibly)

[Guest]

I was being groomed by older men when I was 16. He was the boyfriend of the woman I babysat for. He would ask me to give him massages and come over while she was at work. Haha I was smart enough to catch on. So instead of a massage with my hand I would take the kids toy trucks and drive them up/down his back. He would just buy me things and talk like he was hitting on me. It grossed me out! Once he was supposed to give me a ride home and said he had to stop home first and asked if I wanted to go in his house. I went in there were other men there and girls from my high school getting drunk with them. He offered me a drink I didn’t take it. My the time we left one of the girls was giving a guy a blow job on the couch in front of everybody. He did bring me home. But first he took me to cvs and got me a prepaid cellphone and put a $100 minutes card on it so he could contact me. I told my boyfriend about what happened. A few days later it was getting dark and my boyfriend and I were walk in his neighborhood. My boyfriend asked me to show him the house. There was a glass Snapple type bottle as we were walking. My boyfriend threw that bottle through the guys front window. We ran so fast then started making out a few blocks away. My boyfriend was exactly one day older than me and he was the love of my life. I swear to this day that man would do anything for me. But it’s been 15 years since we dated but my memory of that creep is very vivid.

[deltathree]

The fact that Mom doesn't like it and Dad still makes it happen tells me there's something going on. While it might not be sexual abuse (he's not doing anything to her except having him give her a massage) it sure sounds like sexual grooming and he's taking advantage of the fact that she has no idea what he's doing. If it were me I'd be calling the school and talking to the school counsellor about what's going on. There's a chance it will turn you into the bad guy but it could save your neice from a lot of pain. If she's 17 he could be biding his time untl she's "legal".

I agree. He sounds like a creepy perv.

[leadfoot40]

17 year olds cam be sneaky. Still sounds like an affair

Sounds more like an affair than abuse.

I know this girl. I’ve known her since she was 6. There is no way she could or would intentionally do this. She’s actively known around school for not knowing the difference between wanting S*x and love - but thankfully nobody has actually had S*x with her. My sons words were ‘they value their reputation over a quick f**k’.