What is up with my friends and family talking about my “next” relationship, while in the middle of a divorce?

[Anon]

Because someone should shoot me if I date anyone for two years & even then I don’t trust that I would know the difference between a good guy and a narcissistic user. So I want to be left alone

[famousglm714]

Just start talking about things that make them uncomfortable. Like hey mom, how are those hemorrhoids working out for you? Haha. Or whatever gross things you know about them. People shut up when you make them comfortable. I'm great at it. :/

[Guest]

"I am going to take some time to be single and figure out my next move in life but thank you for your concern"

That is what I would say or something like that

[RedBottoms]

Good for you. I think you should go to therapy and work on yourself first so you are right that you will be able to better identify red flags and the right person for you

[Guest]

I experienced the other side of the coin. I divorced a serial cheater and everyone acted like I needed to wait a specific period of time to date which varied depending on which expert was giving the unsolicited advice. Some people just like thinking they're the boss of others.

[Reedusstalker]

When my friend's marriage ended, some of our friends would say things like that to her. They thought they were comforting her, assuring her that she wouldn't be single forever. It upset her too because she was like, why do they think I need a man or even want another one.

[Anon]

Good for you. I think you should go to therapy and work on yourself first so you are right that you will be able to better identify red flags and the right person for you

I will work on me, focus on my kids and building a life I absolutely love. But I don’t want a person. Right or wrong I just want to do things on my own or with friends and family.

[Anon]

When my friend's marriage ended, some of our friends would say things like that to her. They thought they were comforting her, assuring her that she wouldn't be single forever. It upset her too because she was like, why do they think I need a man or even want another one.

It’s not comforting at all. I don’t want anyone else. I’m going to love the ever loving he’ll out of my singleness

[mrsmacgiver]

Oh, yeah.

People will do that.

Just give it to them straight. "I am really not interested in meeting anyone any time soon, especially while I'm still in the middle of a divorce. I really don't want to think about it at all. Please don't bring it up to me. It will happen when it happens."

If they continue, "I've already mentioned this to you and it makes me very uncomfortable. Cut it out."

[Good]

At least you’re not posting under your screen name on a public forum anymore... kudos.