Do any of you have parent(s) like this?

[Anonymous 1]

Since I was a very small child, it was like I knew "my role" of being a caretaker to both parents. I was there for them emotionally, physically, everything. But then when I needed something in my life (like any type of emotional support even when I was in the hospital) they were not there. Their "illnesses" would not make them not at least be there for me emotionally, but they refused to be. Have any of you dealt with this with parent(s) or anyone in your life and if so, what did you do later with the relationship?

[mater-three]

Yep! Look up narcissistic parents - and see if anything seems familiar for you. I was the family scapegoat.

[MonarchMom]

You may want to read about the dynamics of Narcissistic and dependent parents. The patterns can follow throughout your life, and effect the way you parent as well.

This book is very helpful.

[KendallsMom]

I'm so sorry you dealt with that. My mom raised us because dad checked out after my triplet sister died when we were 3. I have very few memories of him, but my mom was a good mom. Not perfect, but she did her best.

Best wishes.

[Valentina327]

That sucks. I'm sorry that's the hand you were dealt.

[Anonymous 2]

I'm so sorry you dealt with that. My mom raised us because dad checked out after my triplet sister died when we were 3. I have very few memories of him, but my mom was a good mom. Not perfect, but she did her best.

Best wishes.

That must have been awful. I'm sorry. How did she die?

[carterscutie85]

Mine is like that with my oldest sister. They are only 15 years apart and she treats my sister like a best friend instead of a daughter. She was abusive to me and my siblings, didn't lean on us for support but how dare we show love to our Dad, no, she had to be loved MORE and had to know she was better than him in our eyes.

[carterscutie85]

Yep! Look up narcissistic parents - and see if anything seems familiar for you. I was the family scapegoat.

I was the scapegoat as an adult when I gained weight. When my sister was a kid she was chubby and was the scapegoat. Basically if you were fat then you were treated like dirt..unless you were a boy. Boys could be fat. Not girls.

[mater-three]

Yep! Look up narcissistic parents - and see if anything seems familiar for you. I was the family scapegoat.

I was the scapegoat as an adult when I gained weight. When my sister was a kid she was chubby and was the scapegoat. Basically if you were fat then you were treated like dirt..unless you were a boy. Boys could be fat. Not girls.

I’m sorry. Physical appearance has nothing to do with someone’s worth and character.

My aunt raised us. She was a horrible woman. Anything that she saw as her weakness was projected on me. “I lacked empathy and I had a smart mouth” for example. Neither of those things are true. In fact, when people are upset or hurting, I feel it like it’s my own burden. I hurt for them. It’s heartbreaking for me.

She had tons of “flying monkeys” that believed everything she said. My sister was the “golden child”.

There was a lot more abuse.

[KendallsMom]

I'm so sorry you dealt with that. My mom raised us because dad checked out after my triplet sister died when we were 3. I have very few memories of him, but my mom was a good mom. Not perfect, but she did her best.

Best wishes.

That must have been awful. I'm sorry. How did she die?

She died of a malignant brain tumor.