Have you been in a rush?

Anonymous 1

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I feel I have been in a rush my whole entire life (almost 50). If you have lived that way before or currently, and you want/wanted to change, what things have you done to slow down?
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RIZZY
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Just being prepared and organized helps me immensely.

Decluttering helps a lot. Buy and own less stuff.

Wake up earlier than I really need to. I get my coffee and breakfast in before the kids wake up or need anything from me. I also take this time to figure out what is important for that day.

Making my bed. This doesn't give me more time during the day but it helps me feel calmer and think more clearly.

Say no to stuff. We don't do much during the week, there's no time.

Don't let things slide and wait around. My laundry was a big source of stress for me so now when I do my laundry, I wash it and put everything away on the same day. I also got rid of everything in my closet that I don't LOVE, or that I make excuses not to wear. Some things I wanted to keep in case they fit me again some day but I took them out of my closet. Now, when I go to get ready in the morning, I have a closet full of organized clothes and ONLY clothes I will actually wear.

I have started giving different times to people I invite over or to meet somewhere because they are always either late or early. My mom always comes over 20 minutes before the time I give her. She did this on Mother's Day and showed up when I was bringing her gifts in and still getting ready. So, now, I tell her 30 minutes later than I tell everyone else.

We also keep a huge, color-coded family calendar in our kitchen and I have both my work and personal calendars synced on my phone and laptop.

Also, when I am going somewhere like an appointment or to work, I tell myself I need to be there earlier than I really do. If I need to be there by 8, I show up by 7:40. There are some exceptions, like I wouldn't show up to a person's home 20 minutes early. But I like to be a little bit early to work and appointments, things like that.
EarlGrayHot
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Could you explain further?
Anonymous 1

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I feel rushed to get things done. Like right now we are building a deck. I feel rushed to get it done by a certain time. I feel rushed to get the mowing done, the laundry done, my work outs done so I can get to other things, etc, etc. I just always feel rushed to get things done. I would like to just chill and not care so much and not be in a rush. Does that help with my question?
EarlGrayHot wrote: Tue May 23, 2023 1:40 pm Could you explain further?
Anonymous 1

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Thanks for your input! I feel like my life is just one big to do list. It makes me feel organized to write everything down but it also can stress me out to look at everything that needs done. I just always feel like I am in a rush to get things done and it drains me and overwhelms me. I would like to be more chill and just think eh, it will get done when it gets done. Instead I am always thinking, I need to get this done and then this, then this, etc. and I feel rushed.
RIZZY wrote: Tue May 23, 2023 1:39 pm Just being prepared and organized helps me immensely.

Decluttering helps a lot. Buy and own less stuff.

Wake up earlier than I really need to. I get my coffee and breakfast in before the kids wake up or need anything from me. I also take this time to figure out what is important for that day.

Making my bed. This doesn't give me more time during the day but it helps me feel calmer and think more clearly.

Say no to stuff. We don't do much during the week, there's no time.

Don't let things slide and wait around. My laundry was a big source of stress for me so now when I do my laundry, I wash it and put everything away on the same day. I also got rid of everything in my closet that I don't LOVE, or that I make excuses not to wear. Some things I wanted to keep in case they fit me again some day but I took them out of my closet. Now, when I go to get ready in the morning, I have a closet full of organized clothes and ONLY clothes I will actually wear.

I have started giving different times to people I invite over or to meet somewhere because they are always either late or early. My mom always comes over 20 minutes before the time I give her. She did this on Mother's Day and showed up when I was bringing her gifts in and still getting ready. So, now, I tell her 30 minutes later than I tell everyone else.

We also keep a huge, color-coded family calendar in our kitchen and I have both my work and personal calendars synced on my phone and laptop.

Also, when I am going somewhere like an appointment or to work, I tell myself I need to be there earlier than I really do. If I need to be there by 8, I show up by 7:40. There are some exceptions, like I wouldn't show up to a person's home 20 minutes early. But I like to be a little bit early to work and appointments, things like that.
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RIZZY
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Anonymous 1 wrote: Tue May 23, 2023 1:47 pm Thanks for your input! I feel like my life is just one big to do list. It makes me feel organized to write everything down but it also can stress me out to look at everything that needs done. I just always feel like I am in a rush to get things done and it drains me and overwhelms me. I would like to be more chill and just think eh, it will get done when it gets done. Instead I am always thinking, I need to get this done and then this, then this, etc. and I feel rushed.
RIZZY wrote: Tue May 23, 2023 1:39 pm Just being prepared and organized helps me immensely.

Decluttering helps a lot. Buy and own less stuff.

Wake up earlier than I really need to. I get my coffee and breakfast in before the kids wake up or need anything from me. I also take this time to figure out what is important for that day.

Making my bed. This doesn't give me more time during the day but it helps me feel calmer and think more clearly.

Say no to stuff. We don't do much during the week, there's no time.

Don't let things slide and wait around. My laundry was a big source of stress for me so now when I do my laundry, I wash it and put everything away on the same day. I also got rid of everything in my closet that I don't LOVE, or that I make excuses not to wear. Some things I wanted to keep in case they fit me again some day but I took them out of my closet. Now, when I go to get ready in the morning, I have a closet full of organized clothes and ONLY clothes I will actually wear.

I have started giving different times to people I invite over or to meet somewhere because they are always either late or early. My mom always comes over 20 minutes before the time I give her. She did this on Mother's Day and showed up when I was bringing her gifts in and still getting ready. So, now, I tell her 30 minutes later than I tell everyone else.

We also keep a huge, color-coded family calendar in our kitchen and I have both my work and personal calendars synced on my phone and laptop.

Also, when I am going somewhere like an appointment or to work, I tell myself I need to be there earlier than I really do. If I need to be there by 8, I show up by 7:40. There are some exceptions, like I wouldn't show up to a person's home 20 minutes early. But I like to be a little bit early to work and appointments, things like that.
Could that be a trauma response? I keep seeing therapist influencers saying that if you feel like you always have to be doing something, then it could be because your parents didn't allow you to rest as a kid unless all of your chores were done, etc. I would explore why you feel that way. You deserve to rest and relax. Mowing can wait.
Deleted User 2267

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I was in a rush all day everyday in Los Angeles…


I am barely ever in a rush living in Arkansas…
Anonymous 2

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No. I have never answered the call of those around me. Unlike others, I can avoid the pitfalls of big city rushing.
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Bobcobbagob wrote: Tue May 23, 2023 1:56 pm I was in a rush all day everyday in Los Angeles…


I am barely ever in a rush living in Arkansas…
I find the opposite is true, especially in Spring!😂
"The books that the world calls immoral are books that show its own shame." - Oscar Wilde
Anonymous 3

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If I'm feeling overwhelmed and like life is a big to do list I try to refocus my thinking especially at the end of the day from what has to be done to what have I accomplished today. I also make sure to list the little things (in my head I don't write it down) that I do daily as well as the things that I do for myself because I'm really trying to make myself more of a priority. So today would look like...
Made breakfast sandwiches on homemade bread with eggs fresh from my chickens (the little things remember)
Homeschooled my kids and celebrated with my youngest who has been struggling in math but got a 100 today without any help.
Took care of the chickens
Made sure the kids mowed the lawn
Did dishes
Did laundry
Refilled our berkey and the water in the fridge
Made a nice lunch using leftovers (yay me!)
Got my steps in for the day
Spent time engrossed in a book
Put the warm food away I bought at the grocery store yesterday
Wiped down the kitchen
Finished sewing recital costumes
Cleaned the roller on the roomba and ran it
Started packing food for camping this weekend

See so many little things but when I make a list I can see that I've accomplished a lot! I've really started asking myself Did I do my best today to make sure everyone (including myself) has their needs provided for? Is there anything that absolutely had to be done today that I didn't accomplish?
It really helps me to not be so hard on myself.
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