S/O To Grandparent Rights

[Conweis]

My late fiance, Steven's mother never wanted to claim our children. I think in her twisted little mind she was upset that I was a parent to my children (and stepchildren) while Steven's ex left the kids with her all the time.
Even after Steven passed, she chose not to try and be involved in their lives. She would come to town and "not have time" for the kids. Steven has been gone almost seven years and she has maybe seen them once since his passing.
BUT recently she has reached out to my sister expressing her desire to see the boys. My sister informed me that the woman is dying and wants to see the boys. I said no.
Some members in my family are upset about that, but I don't care. I think if Steven was alive, he would had seen his mother but not make the children go.
I did ask my oldest who is 19, and he said he doesn't want to see her. He doesn't like her. My 17 year old doesn't even remember her, neither do the younger children.

[Deleted User 1990]

Send her pictures.

[Anonymous 1]

She hasn't reached out to you. You didn't get the message. I don't blame you for not going.

My late fiance, Steven's mother never wanted to claim our children. I think in her twisted little mind she was upset that I was a parent to my children (and stepchildren) while Steven's ex left the kids with her all the time.
Even after Steven passed, she chose not to try and be involved in their lives. She would come to town and "not have time" for the kids. Steven has been gone almost seven years and she has maybe seen them once since his passing.
BUT recently she has reached out to my sister expressing her desire to see the boys. My sister informed me that the woman is dying and wants to see the boys. I said no.
Some members in my family are upset about that, but I don't care. I think if Steven was alive, he would had seen his mother but not make the children go.
I did ask my oldest who is 19, and he said he doesn't want to see her. He doesn't like her. My 17 year old doesn't even remember her, neither do the younger children.

[newyearnewring]

If she's one of those unpleasant people to be around in general, I would send pictures and maybe not go. Otherwise, I wouldn't "ask" the kids if they wanted to go. I would just act like it's the most normal thing in the world, going to grandma's house this weekend. Since the 19 year old has already been asked and expressed he didn't want to, I would leave that alone for now. If the younger ones go with you and decide they don't want to go back, then that's that.

[Deleted User 1977]

Since your children have no interest or don't even remember her, and given the previous circumstance of a lack of interest toward them, I would feel the same way you do.

[Baconqueen13]

If she really wanted to see the boys she would have reached out to you NOT your sister.

[carterscutie85]

I would leave it up to my kids but I don't see the point in building a relationship with someone who doesn't have much time left. That's setting yourself up for heartbreak.

[KendallsMom]

I don't blame you.

[Heyteacher]

I’m one who says death is final-there are no more chances…however…In this case it’s as if she already died.

She had, in my opinion, had many opportunities to remedy the relationship. If the kids don’t want to revisit this relationship the. Don’t force it.

I’m sorry for them, all kiddos are a blessing regardless of their genetics. This woman missed out.

[Conweis]

If she really wanted to see the boys she would have reached out to you NOT your sister.

She can't reach out to me anymore. I changed my phone number several years ago, but until 2022 I had the same address. In that time she had a plenty of opportunity in contacting me.
Surprisingly, my mother and sister have respected my wishes and not given my info to others prior to my consent.