Let's have the nut discussion again

User avatar
LiveWhatULove
Donated
Donated
Princess
Princess
Posts: 13961
Joined: Mon May 21, 2018 7:55 am

Unread post

BobCobbMagob wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 10:24 am
LiveWhatULove wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 10:16 am
BobCobbMagob wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 9:49 am

No… they don’t.

I mean, I hate to say it, but not everyone deserves the same amount of compassion and forethought.

The kid that will literally die, needs way more compassion than the kid who only wants to eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for lunch. And I say that as a the parent of a kid who is crazy picky.

I guess it’s good to teach kids that the masses won’t always cater to them, because that’s true.

But if your kid is a part of the masses, I think they should damn well be expected to help keep their classmates alive.
Do you believe policy banning nut butter in a1200 person high school can successfully be implemented to a level that takes a risk for someone with such an severe allergy, even remote exposure from several tables over could kill them?

As a mom, who has watched her kid have an anaphylactic reaction — I would argue HELL to the F NO!

And if that is the answer, it is ridiculous to say, “well it may help a bit” so F all the other kids & their needs. I would argue there are far more effective policies that are actually SAFER.

It is school virtue signaling, supporting a policy that is ineffective at that level, just so you can say “we care more than others…

And edited to add — when I say “support” I mean you agree with it.

“Follow” means, you follow the rules, because that’s what we do, even when we disagree with the policy — I agree, if those are the rules, I would follows them, I just think the rule should be changed.
If it takes the risk level from 80% to 10% , I’m willing to do my part to facilitate that.

And yeah… even as the parent of a really picky eater I’m fully willing to say ( in much more PC terms) to my own children - sorry… f**k your feelings kid, I’m not packing nuts in your lunch if it could kill the kid sitting next to you.
Well, I do not think it even comes close to lowering the risk that low at high school. So we agree to disagree. And I think policing the other 1198 lunches and snacks and backpacks is impossible. So all the sacrifice your picky eater makes us in vain.

But I get it, it is the kind thing to do. But if my kids still had signs of anaphylactic reactions to that degree, no way would I trust such a policy. Your kids are learning by example to be thoughtful!

But beyond that we’ll agree to disagree.
User avatar
Baconqueen13
Princess Royal
Princess Royal
Posts: 6811
Joined: Mon May 21, 2018 12:10 am
Location: In Sanity

Unread post

I would assume that at the high school level if the school is going to a nut free campus it means one of the incoming students has such a severe allergy that they will literally die. In which case I am all for the nut ban. If you're having trouble coming up with lunch ideas for your kid maybe opt for the school lunches as the school cafeteria will have to comply with the nut ban as well. As for snacks you'll just have to get creative. Sunflower butter is an option now and is often used as a peanut butter substitute. Fruits and veggies are always a good option, so are Hard boiled eggs. My kids often take leftovers from dinner for lunches too (just maybe leave the Thai leftovers with peanut sauce at home).
Pjmm
Donated
Donated
Princess
Princess
Posts: 18971
Joined: Mon May 21, 2018 6:31 am

Unread post

LiveWhatULove wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 9:28 am
BobCobbMagob wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 9:09 am
LiveWhatULove wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 9:04 am

I think most moms are rule followers, but just disagree with the policy.

I feel such a rule is just inadequate to keep such a medical fragile teen safe. As a mom with 2 nut allergy kids, it was damn near impossible to manage in a small daycare & younger ages. I could not imagine expecting middle school, high school or a work place to create such an environment.

Although I love the sentiment of kindness and compassion towards keeping others healthy — it works both ways. My children would NEVER want to inconvenience 100’s of families for their medical or developmental issues.
Dude, Inconvenience me.

I would so much rather feel inconvenienced than guilty for hurting a child and my kids feel the same.


They’ve attended nut free schools for pretty much their entire elementary school years and some middle school years, it’s not a real problem for us, but it is a real problem for the people with allergies.
And I applaud you & your kids. It is very thoughtful.

But what about the parents who have kids sensory aversion and that is all they will eat? What about parents with food insecurity who only got huge tubs of peanut butter that week from the food pantry? What about the kid that just throws the meat & cheese sandwich away and find their way to chip & candy instead?

Those deserve just as much compassion and kindness.

And once again, if a teen is so sensitive, that nuts anywhere in the vicinity triggers anaphylaxis, this policy it not effective at these ages, they would be in danger.

My children have several unique needs, grant it, not life threatening, but I think it is emotionally damaging to teach them the masses should sacrifice for them. It promotes a view of selfishness & entitlement. It promotes a sense of victimhood and more and more data is arising these feelings are awful for overall happiness & well-being.
I think school lunches should be nut free. Like there’s a kid in our troop who is allergic to carrots. Can’t have beta carotene which is a coloring. So we plan menus that don’t include that ingredient. Now if one of us brings our own food that’s fine. Or the adults sometimes cook our own meals. But we think we should consider the allergic child and we teach the boys to do likewise as they’re buying the food for themselves. It’s really not a big deal to accommodate someone, at least in a small setting. Read a label, have substitutes, learn how to use an epipen if needed. No the world won’t be considerate or sacrifice. But one’s friends or club can make life easier for a person. Otherwise I have no opinion on nut free schools. If they do it fine. If they have nut free tables that’s fine too. I’m okay with some sort of accommodation. And if all your autistic child will eat is peanut butter that’s fine. Accommodate that too. But he or she needs food sensitivity therapy. They can’t live like that. My son hates vegetables. They make him gag. But slowly he’s learning how to prepare them so he can eat them. Because he has no choice tbh.
Momto2boys973
Princess
Princess
Posts: 20108
Joined: Wed May 23, 2018 5:32 pm

Unread post

At a high school level, I think it’s ridiculous. And actually counterproductive for this with allergies, because whether they like it or not, that’s a condition they have to live with and need to learn to deal with it. The whole world doesn’t have to cater to their needs, it’s them who should learn to navigate a world where the vast majority of people don’t have that challenge. And that’s something that they should learn ASAP. I understand having such rules at a kindergarten level, even elementary school. But by high school, any kid should know that if they have serious allergies, they should look after themselves. I mean, where do we stop? Should nut bans go all the way to college? Workplaces? No nuts ever for anyone?
But I’m with you here. If that was the rule, I would follow it, no big deal. But I do think is doing a disservice to people, with allergies. Having them grow up in this safe, protected environment when they will eventually have to go out into a world where they’re going to have to deal with it, because others won’t always accommodate their needs.
❤️🇮🇱 עמ׳ ישראל חי 🇮🇱❤️
Anonymous 2

Unread post

LiveWhatULove wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 9:28 am
BobCobbMagob wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 9:09 am
LiveWhatULove wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 9:04 am

I think most moms are rule followers, but just disagree with the policy.

I feel such a rule is just inadequate to keep such a medical fragile teen safe. As a mom with 2 nut allergy kids, it was damn near impossible to manage in a small daycare & younger ages. I could not imagine expecting middle school, high school or a work place to create such an environment.

Although I love the sentiment of kindness and compassion towards keeping others healthy — it works both ways. My children would NEVER want to inconvenience 100’s of families for their medical or developmental issues.
Dude, Inconvenience me.

I would so much rather feel inconvenienced than guilty for hurting a child and my kids feel the same.


They’ve attended nut free schools for pretty much their entire elementary school years and some middle school years, it’s not a real problem for us, but it is a real problem for the people with allergies.
And I applaud you & your kids. It is very thoughtful.

But what about the parents who have kids sensory aversion and that is all they will eat? What about parents with food insecurity who only got huge tubs of peanut butter that week from the food pantry? What about the kid that just throws the meat & cheese sandwich away and find their way to chip & candy instead?

Those deserve just as much compassion and kindness.

And once again, if a teen is so sensitive, that nuts anywhere in the vicinity triggers anaphylaxis, this policy it not effective at these ages, they would be in danger.

My children have several unique needs, grant it, not life threatening, but I think it is emotionally damaging to teach them the masses should sacrifice for them. It promotes a view of selfishness & entitlement. It promotes a sense of victimhood and more and more data is arising these feelings are awful for overall happiness & well-being.
I think it's important to teach kids that sometimes they will need to make "inconvenient" accommodations even for just a small minority.
Deleted User 1977

Unread post

If it's an allergy that can potentially harm another person, I think a public school....even a high school....needs to set up rules like this, and a big part of that comes from covering their own possible liability should something happen with a student due to a food allergy.
User avatar
LiveWhatULove
Donated
Donated
Princess
Princess
Posts: 13961
Joined: Mon May 21, 2018 7:55 am

Unread post

Anonymous 2 wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 11:03 am
LiveWhatULove wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 9:28 am
BobCobbMagob wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 9:09 am

Dude, Inconvenience me.

I would so much rather feel inconvenienced than guilty for hurting a child and my kids feel the same.


They’ve attended nut free schools for pretty much their entire elementary school years and some middle school years, it’s not a real problem for us, but it is a real problem for the people with allergies.
And I applaud you & your kids. It is very thoughtful.

But what about the parents who have kids sensory aversion and that is all they will eat? What about parents with food insecurity who only got huge tubs of peanut butter that week from the food pantry? What about the kid that just throws the meat & cheese sandwich away and find their way to chip & candy instead?

Those deserve just as much compassion and kindness.

And once again, if a teen is so sensitive, that nuts anywhere in the vicinity triggers anaphylaxis, this policy it not effective at these ages, they would be in danger.

My children have several unique needs, grant it, not life threatening, but I think it is emotionally damaging to teach them the masses should sacrifice for them. It promotes a view of selfishness & entitlement. It promotes a sense of victimhood and more and more data is arising these feelings are awful for overall happiness & well-being.
I think it's important to teach kids that sometimes they will need to make "inconvenient" accommodations even for just a small minority.
Sure, agree, society does it all the time, I just do not think this specific policy is of value at high school level.
User avatar
LiveWhatULove
Donated
Donated
Princess
Princess
Posts: 13961
Joined: Mon May 21, 2018 7:55 am

Unread post

Pjmm wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 10:39 am
LiveWhatULove wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 9:28 am
BobCobbMagob wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 9:09 am

Dude, Inconvenience me.

I would so much rather feel inconvenienced than guilty for hurting a child and my kids feel the same.


They’ve attended nut free schools for pretty much their entire elementary school years and some middle school years, it’s not a real problem for us, but it is a real problem for the people with allergies.
And I applaud you & your kids. It is very thoughtful.

But what about the parents who have kids sensory aversion and that is all they will eat? What about parents with food insecurity who only got huge tubs of peanut butter that week from the food pantry? What about the kid that just throws the meat & cheese sandwich away and find their way to chip & candy instead?

Those deserve just as much compassion and kindness.

And once again, if a teen is so sensitive, that nuts anywhere in the vicinity triggers anaphylaxis, this policy it not effective at these ages, they would be in danger.

My children have several unique needs, grant it, not life threatening, but I think it is emotionally damaging to teach them the masses should sacrifice for them. It promotes a view of selfishness & entitlement. It promotes a sense of victimhood and more and more data is arising these feelings are awful for overall happiness & well-being.
I think school lunches should be nut free. Like there’s a kid in our troop who is allergic to carrots. Can’t have beta carotene which is a coloring. So we plan menus that don’t include that ingredient. Now if one of us brings our own food that’s fine. Or the adults sometimes cook our own meals. But we think we should consider the allergic child and we teach the boys to do likewise as they’re buying the food for themselves. It’s really not a big deal to accommodate someone, at least in a small setting. Read a label, have substitutes, learn how to use an epipen if needed. No the world won’t be considerate or sacrifice. But one’s friends or club can make life easier for a person. Otherwise I have no opinion on nut free schools. If they do it fine. If they have nut free tables that’s fine too. I’m okay with some sort of accommodation. And if all your autistic child will eat is peanut butter that’s fine. Accommodate that too. But he or she needs food sensitivity therapy. They can’t live like that. My son hates vegetables. They make him gag. But slowly he’s learning how to prepare them so he can eat them. Because he has no choice tbh.
So no home lunches or snacks? How else would you enforce that as school admin that would be more effective than a different dining area or table?

That is my main issue with the policy, you are asking a lot of people to sacrifice for little benefit, KwIM?
User avatar
mcginnisc
Princess Royal
Princess Royal
Posts: 7422
Joined: Mon May 21, 2018 6:29 am

Unread post

LiveWhatULove wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 11:40 am
Pjmm wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 10:39 am
LiveWhatULove wrote: Wed Aug 10, 2022 9:28 am

And I applaud you & your kids. It is very thoughtful.

But what about the parents who have kids sensory aversion and that is all they will eat? What about parents with food insecurity who only got huge tubs of peanut butter that week from the food pantry? What about the kid that just throws the meat & cheese sandwich away and find their way to chip & candy instead?

Those deserve just as much compassion and kindness.

And once again, if a teen is so sensitive, that nuts anywhere in the vicinity triggers anaphylaxis, this policy it not effective at these ages, they would be in danger.

My children have several unique needs, grant it, not life threatening, but I think it is emotionally damaging to teach them the masses should sacrifice for them. It promotes a view of selfishness & entitlement. It promotes a sense of victimhood and more and more data is arising these feelings are awful for overall happiness & well-being.
I think school lunches should be nut free. Like there’s a kid in our troop who is allergic to carrots. Can’t have beta carotene which is a coloring. So we plan menus that don’t include that ingredient. Now if one of us brings our own food that’s fine. Or the adults sometimes cook our own meals. But we think we should consider the allergic child and we teach the boys to do likewise as they’re buying the food for themselves. It’s really not a big deal to accommodate someone, at least in a small setting. Read a label, have substitutes, learn how to use an epipen if needed. No the world won’t be considerate or sacrifice. But one’s friends or club can make life easier for a person. Otherwise I have no opinion on nut free schools. If they do it fine. If they have nut free tables that’s fine too. I’m okay with some sort of accommodation. And if all your autistic child will eat is peanut butter that’s fine. Accommodate that too. But he or she needs food sensitivity therapy. They can’t live like that. My son hates vegetables. They make him gag. But slowly he’s learning how to prepare them so he can eat them. Because he has no choice tbh.
So no home lunches or snacks? How else would you enforce that as school admin that would be more effective than a different dining area or table?

That is my main issue with the policy, you are asking a lot of people to sacrifice for little benefit, KwIM?
Wait.. as someone that works in a hospital are you truly saying that saving a student from death is LITTLE BENEFIT?? Am I reading that correctly? If so.. wow.

I'm the mom that goes out of her way to accomodate any kid that comes to my house. My girls have friends that have food allergies, texture issues, one is vegan..dairy free, gluten free. Yeah.. I will never be okay with possibly causing one of their friends to have a reaction or die because of my selfishness or non-willingness to make sure they are safe in my home. That would extend to school as well. They make sure that their lunches on Mondays will not affect any of their friends. It was the same when they were in private school and not homeschooled. I read labels then and I still do so I can make sure their friends stay safe.
I find it shocking that someone in the healthcare field of all fields would say there is little benefit to making sure a child does not die at school because of allergies.
Claire
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13
LuckyEightWow
Donated
Donated
Princess Royal
Princess Royal
Posts: 5045
Joined: Mon May 21, 2018 7:29 pm

Unread post

The one comment I keep seeing is how ‘the whole world won’t cater to the kid with the allergy’. I’m pretty certain the parents and the kid already know this, they’ve been living in the real world, they aren’t asking the whole world, they’re asking the school.

We don’t give young people enough credit, most aren’t going to want to put another student in harms way, most will try to reduce the risk, most won’t have an issue with it. It’s the parents who tend to get all bent out of shape.
Locked Previous topicNext topic