BM is asking us to change our summer trip plans

Traci_Momof2
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Anonymous 5 wrote: Sun Aug 07, 2022 3:38 pm BM has the final say her kids not yours.
Umm, no. Dad has the final say on Dad's time. This vacation is happening on Dad's time so Mom can suck it up and deal. She doesn't get a say.
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Traci_Momof2 wrote: Tue Aug 09, 2022 3:28 pm If I was your DH I would be telling her "well get over it and get yourself some therapy if you need to, but this is my time and we are not changing our plans". Call me heartless but I don't get the whole "OMG, I can't go that long without seeing my kids, blah blah blah". It sounds like whiney drama to me. My kids have regularly gone elsewhere over the summer for weeks on end without DH and I and I never had a problem with it. I actually enjoyed some solitude and some DH and me only time. And I still talked to the kids on the phone when I wanted to, which I'm sure you and DH can also accommodate for BM on a reasonable basis.

If you (general) are so attached to your kids that you can't go 4 weeks without seeing them in person, you are too attached and it is unhealthy. That is my opinion.
Right??? What is she going to do if the kids go to college away from home? Stalk them? She needs to grow up and her over it.
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Traci_Momof2
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Eh, even then I still wouldn't understand. When I was 14 I spent the entire summer away from home (about 2,000 miles away from home) not seeing my mom at all that entire time. That was in 1990 so we didn't have all that tech stuff either. It was either letters (which I did write one or two home) or long-distance phone calls. That's it.

And neither of us were like "OMG I'm going all summer without seeing you". I actually had a blast. I even dealt with having mono and getting my very first period that summer, and it was still a great summer.
Inmybizz wrote: Sun Aug 07, 2022 3:54 pm If this was back in my day when we didn’t have internet and iPhones when you had to mail a postcard while traveling… I could understand. But with technology-FaceTime, zoom, all the social sites to post videos mom should be able to go 4 weeks without kids right by her side.
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Meh ... Even if she's not, OP stated it is the father's time w the kids. OP is sympathetic to BM, which is nice, but in the end, the father's time is the father's time.

And like InMyBizz said, technology is the BM's friend. They can Facetime her whilst away on holiday.

Anonymous 4 wrote: Tue Aug 09, 2022 3:09 pm LOL you think in this instance the BM would be ok with the kids to miss school when she's already freaking out? That's a good one.
cgd5112 wrote: Tue Aug 09, 2022 2:46 pm We start school on 9/7. In the past, we've missed the first and the second day of school because of the way DH's vacation was approved/scheduled. If they miss the first day of school, assuming they plan to, it's not the end of the world.


Anonymous 4 wrote: Mon Aug 08, 2022 11:56 am

Right and they didn't even do this trip yet and it's already the 8th. All schools start around then or before.
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