My ex and his relative really irritate me

Anonymous 1

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I should probably just stop speaking to her, she's obviously two-faced. For the past few years I've only responded whenever she texts me, and I'm always sure not to say anything I wouldn't want repeated.
The thing is, it seems like anytime my ex says anything about me to her, she texts me and tells me all about it. She'll even send me screenshots and then I end up irritated because my ex is spreading lies about me. I'd almost rather not know, but at the same time I guess I've gotten used to having an "insider". I guess the mature thing would be to ask her not to inform me about what he's saying and then go from there. I've actually told her that before but afterwards she got in my head and I took it back and told her she needn't stop. It's always worse around school breaks because that's when he's supposed to see my kids and I have no dealings with him the rest of the time.
Pjmm
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You wanted to hear the updates so she’s obliging. Tell her this is really getting to you and she needs to stop. Then take it seriously. Don’t respond or block her. I mean who really cares what he says? Unless he’s alienating your kids against you it doesn’t matter.
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RIZZY
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You have no reason to be speaking to her. It sounds like they're relishing knowing that they're getting to you. I'd just block them.
Anonymous 1

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This is probably what I needed to hear. He just says the most absurd things, like he'll flake out on his visitation and then blame me along with some made up story about what I've done this time. I don't live around there anymore but I just hate my name being besmirched in my hometown.
Pjmm wrote: Thu Aug 04, 2022 12:52 pm You wanted to hear the updates so she’s obliging. Tell her this is really getting to you and she needs to stop. Then take it seriously. Don’t respond or block her. I mean who really cares what he says? Unless he’s alienating your kids against you it doesn’t matter.
Anonymous 1

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I don't think that's it, he'll message her saying I won't let him have the kids or something similar and then she'll show me. I really don't think he's in on it but you're probably right about the rest of it.
RIZZY wrote: Thu Aug 04, 2022 1:03 pm You have no reason to be speaking to her. It sounds like they're relishing knowing that they're getting to you. I'd just block them.
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Tell her she already knows he’s a liar. Add that you’re tired of hearing about it and ask her to stop letting you know. If you otherwise have a good relationship with this person and want to continue it, then don’t block her. However, be polite but firm in asking her to stop telling you the latest in the ex husband’s lies show. Better yet, if she continues, ignore it. Only reply to the other content in her texts. If she asks why you have not replied to her comments on your ex’s lies, remind her that you couldn’t care less to hear about them and move on. There’s plenty of juicy gossip to talk about that doesn’t involve your ex, I’m sure.
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Anonymous 1 wrote: Thu Aug 04, 2022 1:10 pm This is probably what I needed to hear. He just says the most absurd things, like he'll flake out on his visitation and then blame me along with some made up story about what I've done this time. I don't live around there anymore but I just hate my name being besmirched in my hometown.
Pjmm wrote: Thu Aug 04, 2022 12:52 pm You wanted to hear the updates so she’s obliging. Tell her this is really getting to you and she needs to stop. Then take it seriously. Don’t respond or block her. I mean who really cares what he says? Unless he’s alienating your kids against you it doesn’t matter.
Yeah but the ones who know him probably realize he might be lying. The rest aren’t important because you don’t live there.
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