I don't know how to help my friend

[Anonymous 1]

She was on anti depressants after her son died and she always seemed so happy and bubbly.

Then her Dad died and while I could tell she was hurting she was still for the most part her usual happy self.

Recently she has struggled a lot with his death. It was just the 3 year anniversary of his passing. She went to the E.R. because she felt like she was having heart palpitations.

She was fine, just the added stress because of it being the anniversary of his death. She had never had any heart issues before.

Now I've never been on anti depressants. But this doesn't sound right to me.

The doctor completely took her off what she was on. Cold turkey.

And he prescribed her a sedative which also helps with anxiety.

I looked up the sedative and it said may cause suicidal thoughts!!

And it says take 3 times a day right on the bottle!

How is she supposed to take it 3 times a day, she has little kids to care for during the day.

Since she has been on this medicine which has been a couple months she's been very weepy and just not herself. Like impulsive, she doesn't act sad all the time but the littlest thing sets her off and she was never like that before.

I don't know how to help her. I do know who some of the top doctors are for mental health in my area so I gave her the numbers of them. But idk if they'll take her insurance.

She's just not the same person and she said she's had suicidal thoughts since being on these meds.

I know that you are not supposed to stop anti depressants cold turkey as well.

Something just doesn't seem right and I feel like she saw a shitty doctor.

But I also don't know how to be there for her. I cook and bake a lot, and have been bringing her food. Our other friend knows a lot about natural supplements for depression and is going to get her hooked up with some. She said me feeding her is exactly what she needs right now but this is just a situation that I don't know how else to fix and I am worried for her.

I get the feeling she wants to quit her job. She got the phone call that her father passed when she was at work. It was sudden. She said now every time the phone rings she looks at the Caller I.D. thinking it's going to be someone she knows with bad news again. After her son passed, she quit the job she was working because she needed a change. So I feel like it's the same situation now. But I don't want to encourage her to quit, I don't know if that's the right choice, but if it's for her mental health maybe it is? Her job pays quite well, more than anything else around here for the same title and I also know she needs the money. Idk what to say about that.

[KendallsMom]

I hope everything works out. I'm at a loss.

Here's a bump.

[MonarchMom]

You don't need to "fix" anything, nor can you. Spending time and giving her meals, someone to talk to, and being present are all helpful. Acknowledging her sadness and allowing her to tell you truthfully how she feels is supporting her. She may have been dulling her emotions for several years with the antidepressants and now those feelings are surfacing.

A therapist may also be helpful and you could ask if she wants to explore that option - it is very different than having a Psychiatric. There are many online options now for talk therapy.

If you are concerned about her being suicidal you can find resources to talk with her about that here: https://www.nami.org/Blogs/NAMI-Blog/Se ... ut-Suicide

[Traci_Momof2]

Did she ever seek professional counseling to help her process her grief? Obviously I don't know your friend, but I get the impression from your post that her core issue could be as simple as not actually processing her grief over her losses. And maybe if she has some professional help with that, then she could get rid of all of the medications.

Obviously I'm no expert. That's just what entered my mind when reading your post. Either way I wish her well.

[RIZZY]

I don't think you can fix her. You can only try to be a good friend.

One thing that is helping me is to talk about who my dad. Tell all the stories from my childhood. I was so lucky to have had a dad like him in my early childhood. It feels good to tell people those things about him.

[Vegaswife2011]

I don't think you can fix her. You can only try to be a good friend.

One thing that is helping me is to talk about who my dad. Tell all the stories from my childhood. I was so lucky to have had a dad like him in my early childhood. It feels good to tell people those things about him.

Hugs