I gave her cancer!

[Anonymous 4]

Sure.
My mother is amazing. But you think what you want to make yourself feel better about forcing your kids to be around you and keeping them codependent on you i feel sorry for you and your kids. You bullied your dd and it's sad.

Hey BeachBrat, you played your hand too many times the rest of us can tell its you commenting as anon 3.

Boy you can't help yourself & just keep showing the rest of us that you need to keep going because it's you who needs to feel better about yourself.

Yeah, I was thinking too, why do beachbrat’s happyfaces show up sideways whereas everyone else’s are right side up?

And she has been doing that throughout her multiple screen names on here.

[mcginnisc]

Sure.
My mother is amazing. But you think what you want to make yourself feel better about forcing your kids to be around you and keeping them codependent on you i feel sorry for you and your kids. You bullied your dd and it's sad.

Hey BeachBrat, you played your hand too many times the rest of us can tell its you commenting as anon 3.

Boy you can't help yourself & just keep showing the rest of us that you need to keep going because it's you who needs to feel better about yourself.

Yeah, I was thinking too, why do beachbrat’s happyfaces show up sideways whereas everyone else’s are right side up?

Huh.. that's weird... in the post, they show as rolling on the floor laughing emojis..however, when I hit quote, they turn into just slanted laughing emojis like they show up on my phone/tablet. Bizarre...

[Anonymous 10]

I really hope this is a troll post OPs attitude seems so wrong here

[Deleted User 1949]

Hey BeachBrat, you played your hand too many times the rest of us can tell its you commenting as anon 3.

Boy you can't help yourself & just keep showing the rest of us that you need to keep going because it's you who needs to feel better about yourself.

Yeah, I was thinking too, why do beachbrat’s happyfaces show up sideways whereas everyone else’s are right side up?

Huh.. that's weird... in the post, they show as rolling on the floor laughing emojis..however, when I hit quote, they turn into just slanted laughing emojis like they show up on my phone/tablet. Bizarre...

For me they’re just all sideways slanted. I wonder if that’s something to do with the emojis on iPhones and Androids?

[Anonymous 6]

Everyone is reeling from this news, not just the daughter. The entire family. Her mom is trying to strategize. I don't think this is control at all. I think the mom is just trying to think levelheaded and practically, because that's what moms do. They remain calm in a crisis to help their child. I have gotten this news, twice, and your mind bubbles over with thoughts and fears and decisions that have to be made IMMEDIATELY. Do I want a mastectomy for sure? Do I want immediate reconstruction? Implants or fat grafting? Can I save my lymph nodes so I am not facing a lifetime of lymphedema? These are mind boggling decisions. But - There is no time to ponder. Surgery needs to happen ASAFP before this rotten tumor gets bigger or invades more tissue. There is a window to begin chemo if you are going to do it. Once you pass that window, the efficacy is greatly reduced so you have to decide that course in the immediate term. Then you are trying to picture yourself bald. You are Googling wigs. Can I get a wig made from my own hair if I cut it off before it starts to fall out? Will people at work know? Will I look normal? Radiation follows after the chemo. There are a lot of life changing choices to be made in a very small window of time. I think Mom is just trying to take care of the logistics side as the daughter has enough to worry about.

Yep i know all about, have watched family go through it and been there to help them. Never once did any one act pushy or self like OP. Yes i get trying to make a plan but it's not HER plan to make, and can make suggestions but at the end of the day it's up to her dd if she wants to move back home or not. But OP has done nothing but talk about how inconvenient this will be for HER and how inconvenient they are now.

IF her dd wants to live at home cool that's her Choice but if she does not That's also her choice and her mother shouldn't be pushy and try to force her dd to do something she doesn't want to. And she also shouldn't hold the things she chooses to do for her dd and grandchild over their heads to manipulate them. Which is exactly what she has done.

No, what’s happening here is that you’re hearing from multiple people WHO HAVE GONE THROUGH IT saying it’s understandable what this mother is going through.
And you’re disagreeing with the logistical panic that comes along with this because YOU SAW PEOPLE GO THROUGH IT.
You have no idea if you’ve never done it.

I've done it. OP is acting crazy and no one is going to benefit from that.

[Anonymous 3]

Hey BeachBrat, you played your hand too many times the rest of us can tell its you commenting as anon 3.

Boy you can't help yourself & just keep showing the rest of us that you need to keep going because it's you who needs to feel better about yourself.

Yeah, I was thinking too, why do beachbrat’s happyfaces show up sideways whereas everyone else’s are right side up?

And she has been doing that throughout her multiple screen names on here.

Y'all are funny when you try to figure out who anon are. Nope not beachbrat.

[Anonymous 1]

Nice troll post bumpitybumpbump. You finally got one going!!

Unfortunately it's not a troll post. I wish it was.

[Anonymous 5]

Yep i know all about, have watched family go through it and been there to help them. Never once did any one act pushy or self like OP. Yes i get trying to make a plan but it's not HER plan to make, and can make suggestions but at the end of the day it's up to her dd if she wants to move back home or not. But OP has done nothing but talk about how inconvenient this will be for HER and how inconvenient they are now.

IF her dd wants to live at home cool that's her Choice but if she does not That's also her choice and her mother shouldn't be pushy and try to force her dd to do something she doesn't want to. And she also shouldn't hold the things she chooses to do for her dd and grandchild over their heads to manipulate them. Which is exactly what she has done.

No, what’s happening here is that you’re hearing from multiple people WHO HAVE GONE THROUGH IT saying it’s understandable what this mother is going through.
And you’re disagreeing with the logistical panic that comes along with this because YOU SAW PEOPLE GO THROUGH IT.
You have no idea if you’ve never done it.

I've done it. OP is acting crazy and no one is going to benefit from that.

I have done it twice, and I am currently doing it for the third time. OP is not handling the situation well. Cancer takes away so many choices. No one, not even your mother, has the right to take away the remaining choices. Cancer treatment sucks. Cancer medication sucks. Cancer pain sucks. Cancer limits your choices and your lifestyle. Cancer sucks. The people in your life should not take away what choices cancer leaves you with.

[Anonymous 1]

No, what’s happening here is that you’re hearing from multiple people WHO HAVE GONE THROUGH IT saying it’s understandable what this mother is going through.
And you’re disagreeing with the logistical panic that comes along with this because YOU SAW PEOPLE GO THROUGH IT.
You have no idea if you’ve never done it.

I've done it. OP is acting crazy and no one is going to benefit from that.

I have done it twice, and I am currently doing it for the third time. OP is not handling the situation well. Cancer takes away so many choices. No one, not even your mother, has the right to take away the remaining choices. Cancer treatment sucks. Cancer medication sucks. Cancer pain sucks. Cancer limits your choices and your lifestyle. Cancer sucks. The people in your life should not take away what choices cancer leaves you with.

I honestly would like to know how I have taken away her choices??

You're all acting like I told her that she HAS to move home. Where in the post or comments did I ever say that??

What I did was write a post here trying to give dd & I both some time to let it sink in before we starting talking frankly about reality of the situation.

What I said was , that she needs to move home so the family can rally around her. As a survivor of cancer , I truly know what she's in for & I know my dd as I'm her best friend. I'm who she calls first about anything & everything.

The reality is we just went through all this financial stuff 5 months ago when she was on maternity leave. She like most of you thought short term disability will pay.. Yep $157/week. This is why she couldn't pay her rent when on maternity leave & my dad paid for it.. She makes so much more to be able to afford the $1035/rent .

We have talked she's going to check with HR to see if she can take the family medical leave act ( the laws were changed) if she can't she knows she can not afford the apartment during treatment & surgeries on disability.

Whether or not she keeps the apartment, she's decided she does want a bed set up in the baby's room here. That way she can be comfortable when she spends the night. She just spent 3 nights on the couch cuz she didn't want to go home. Lol

[Anonymous 3]

I've done it. OP is acting crazy and no one is going to benefit from that.

I have done it twice, and I am currently doing it for the third time. OP is not handling the situation well. Cancer takes away so many choices. No one, not even your mother, has the right to take away the remaining choices. Cancer treatment sucks. Cancer medication sucks. Cancer pain sucks. Cancer limits your choices and your lifestyle. Cancer sucks. The people in your life should not take away what choices cancer leaves you with.

I honestly would like to know how I have taken away her choices??

You're all acting like I told her that she HAS to move home. Where in the post or comments did I ever say that??

What I did was write a post here trying to give dd & I both some time to let it sink in before we starting talking frankly about reality of the situation.

What I said was , that she needs to move home so the family can rally around her. As a survivor of cancer , I truly know what she's in for & I know my dd as I'm her best friend. I'm who she calls first about anything & everything.

The reality is we just went through all this financial stuff 5 months ago when she was on maternity leave. She like most of you thought short term disability will pay.. Yep $157/week. This is why she couldn't pay her rent when on maternity leave & my dad paid for it.. She makes so much more to be able to afford the $1035/rent .

We have talked she's going to check with HR to see if she can take the family medical leave act ( the laws were changed) if she can't she knows she can not afford the apartment during treatment & surgeries on disability.

Whether or not she keeps the apartment, she's decided she does want a bed set up in the baby's room here. That way she can be comfortable when she spends the night. She just spent 3 nights on the couch cuz she didn't want to go home. Lol

You refused to hear any other suggestions or opinion or advice and just kept saying "i will be inconvenienced" and "it will be easier on ME" refusing to acknowledge that your dd is the only one who gets to make this decision. You made it more about you and less about her in your post.