Long distance relationship questions

Unread post Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:04 pm

If you've ever been in a long distance relationship how long was it before you discussed and or had one of you moving closer to the other?

My boyfriend and I live an hour away which isn't too far but we do live in different states. Because of work schedules and kids we see each other once or twice a week. Now that school is starting I'm sure it will be less.

Things are going so great with us. He would be the one who would have to move closer though. He has stated many times about when he moves up here. I just would feel horrible if he gave up.his whole life and it didn't work out.

I know obviously he could just move back but I wouldn't want to have that on my shoulders. I'm not saying we wouldn't work out but there's always that chance.

Also, we would not be moving in together. He would be getting his own place.

Unread post Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:07 pm

My husband and I were in different countries when we met. It took 5 years for us to meet in person and another 3 before I moved in with him.

Unread post Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:09 pm

Anonymous 2 wrote: ↑Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:07 pm My husband and I were in different countries when we met. It took 5 years for us to meet in person and another 3 before I moved in with him.

I'm too old to wait that long. Lol

I'm glad it worked out for you guys.

Unread post Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:14 pm

Neither one of us could move due to staying near a child's parent. He didn't want to wait or move so we ended it.

Unread post Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:22 pm

Well, this may not be relevant to your situation because DH and I were long distance back when we were dating as teenagers. I went to college 2.5 hours away from home, so that was long distance, and then his parents moved away to retire a year later. He moved with them because he couldn’t afford a place on his own yet, and that was about 6.5 hours away from both my house/hometown and my college. It was *super* tough. We saw each other once every few months, and I didn’t know if I was going to be able to handle it or make it work, but I couldn’t just give up on our relationship. It was even more difficult because we were teenagers, so I had to deal with my parents’ rules. Eventually, we sort of lived together during my last year of college (not in our own place) and then moved in together and got married once I graduated college. We ended up moving into a condo in the same city where his parents lived.

Unread post Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:28 pm

Pjmm wrote: ↑Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:14 pm Neither one of us could move due to staying near a child's parent. He didn't want to wait or move so we ended it.

That's understandable but still sad. I am the only one that has children which is why he would have to be the one to move.

Unread post Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:30 pm

lauren08 wrote: ↑Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:22 pm Well, this may not be relevant to your situation because DH and I were long distance back when we were dating as teenagers. I went to college 2.5 hours away from home, so that was long distance, and then his parents moved away to retire a year later. He moved with them because he couldn’t afford a place on his own yet, and that was about 6.5 hours away from both my house/hometown and my college. It was *super* tough. We saw each other once every few months, and I didn’t know if I was going to be able to handle it or make it work, but I couldn’t just give up on our relationship. It was even more difficult because we were teenagers, so I had to deal with my parents’ rules. Eventually, we sort of lived together during my last year of college (not in our own place) and then moved in together and got married once I graduated college. We ended up moving into a condo in the same city where his parents lived.

That is sweet, I'm glad it worked for you two

Unread post Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:31 pm

Anonymous 1 wrote: ↑Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:28 pm
Pjmm wrote: ↑Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:14 pm Neither one of us could move due to staying near a child's parent. He didn't want to wait or move so we ended it.
That's understandable but still sad. I am the only one that has children which is why he would have to be the one to move.

Just as well. Honestly he did me a favor. We would've driven each other crazy I think.

Unread post Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:33 pm

Anonymous 1 wrote: ↑Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:30 pm
lauren08 wrote: ↑Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:22 pm Well, this may not be relevant to your situation because DH and I were long distance back when we were dating as teenagers. I went to college 2.5 hours away from home, so that was long distance, and then his parents moved away to retire a year later. He moved with them because he couldn’t afford a place on his own yet, and that was about 6.5 hours away from both my house/hometown and my college. It was *super* tough. We saw each other once every few months, and I didn’t know if I was going to be able to handle it or make it work, but I couldn’t just give up on our relationship. It was even more difficult because we were teenagers, so I had to deal with my parents’ rules. Eventually, we sort of lived together during my last year of college (not in our own place) and then moved in together and got married once I graduated college. We ended up moving into a condo in the same city where his parents lived.
That is sweet, I'm glad it worked for you two

Thanks, I hope it works out for you too! I know how tough long distance is and how much it sucks. It seems like it makes the most sense for him to move to you. If it doesn’t work out, so be it. He can’t fault you for not being able to see the future

Sometimes you just have to take a chance on things and hope for the best.

Unread post Mon Aug 17, 2020 4:39 pm

He lives an hour away for his job?

Why doesn't he move somewhere that's in between you and his job, so getting to either place isn't a long drive?

Long distance relationship questions

Login • Register