Pretend you love your husband.

[scemily526]

That’s not true. Some people do enjoy it and don’t feel bad about it, but many made a mistake that they regret. My mil has counseled couples who went through infidelity and many who cheated do regret it and don’t do it again.
She had a case of infidelity with a couple that had been married 5 or 6 years, they decided to save their marriage and it’s now 20 years later and they’re still happily married. They send her a thank you card every anniversary.

Wrong.

It's right. No one with self respect would stay with someone who would betray then like that. No intelligent person stays with a cheater because cheaters don't just stop.

and that is an exception much more than rule....i know of sooooooooooooo many more who divorced than stayed after their partner cheated

[LuckyEightWow]

We worked it out eventually.

[jas]

No intelligent woman would stay with a cheater. If you do you are proving that you have no self respect.

Wrong.

It's right. No one with self respect would stay with someone who would betray then like that. No intelligent person stays with a cheater because cheaters don't just stop.

Again - wrong. If the cheater continues, sure. But it's not a black and white issue and someone's level of intelligence has nothing to do with it.

[Anonymous 6]

Once a cheater always a cheater. Someone who is capable of cheating once is capable of cheating again.

No one with self respect or intelligence would allow themselves to stay with someone who would do that even once.

That’s not true. Some people do enjoy it and don’t feel bad about it, but many made a mistake that they regret. My mil has counseled couples who went through infidelity and many who cheated do regret it and don’t do it again.
She had a case of infidelity with a couple that had been married 5 or 6 years, they decided to save their marriage and it’s now 20 years later and they’re still happily married. They send her a thank you card every anniversary.

Wrong.

It's right. No one with self respect would stay with someone who would betray then like that. No intelligent person stays with a cheater because cheaters don't just stop.

[Anonymous 6]

Wrong.

It's right. No one with self respect would stay with someone who would betray then like that. No intelligent person stays with a cheater because cheaters don't just stop.

Again - wrong. If the cheater continues, sure. But it's not a black and white issue and someone's level of intelligence has nothing to do with it.

An intelligent person knows they deserve better than that.

[jas]

Once a cheater always a cheater. Someone who is capable of cheating once is capable of cheating again.

No one with self respect or intelligence would allow themselves to stay with someone who would do that even once.

That’s not true. Some people do enjoy it and don’t feel bad about it, but many made a mistake that they regret. My mil has counseled couples who went through infidelity and many who cheated do regret it and don’t do it again.
She had a case of infidelity with a couple that had been married 5 or 6 years, they decided to save their marriage and it’s now 20 years later and they’re still happily married. They send her a thank you card every anniversary.

It's right. No one with self respect would stay with someone who would betray then like that. No intelligent person stays with a cheater because cheaters don't just stop.

LMAO! Once a cheater always a cheater? Because people never change, right? You are who you were 5, 10, 20 years ago, right? Please... I'm starting to wonder about your intelligence here.

[Anonymous 6]

Once a cheater always a cheater. Someone who is capable of cheating once is capable of cheating again.

No one with self respect or intelligence would allow themselves to stay with someone who would do that even once.

That’s not true. Some people do enjoy it and don’t feel bad about it, but many made a mistake that they regret. My mil has counseled couples who went through infidelity and many who cheated do regret it and don’t do it again.
She had a case of infidelity with a couple that had been married 5 or 6 years, they decided to save their marriage and it’s now 20 years later and they’re still happily married. They send her a thank you card every anniversary.

LMAO! Once a cheater always a cheater? Because people never change, right? You are who you were 5, 10, 20 years ago, right? Please... I'm starting to wonder about your intelligence here.

At the core of who I am no I haven't changed. Someone who cheats has that in their core.

You really think it is intelligent to stay with someone who went against your wedding vows? You think it is intelligent to stay with someone who lied to you? You think it is intelligent to stay with someone who doesn't respect you? You think it is intelligent to stay with someone who risked bringing an STD or a child from another person into your marriage? Not one of those things is intelligent no matter how you try to spin it.

[Momto2boys973]

Maybe, maybe not. As I said, my mil has counseled many couples who have gone to have successful marriages after an infidelity. It’s not as uncommon as you’d like to think.
And that’s why I said that I personally wouldn’t make a choice impulsively and in fits of emotions. Because one factor I would take into account is that MY husband isn’t a cheating man and he does have a strong moral character. So if it came to that, I would know that if he made that mistake, regretted it and wanted to work in our marriage that he was sincere. So I would probably give it a shot.

That’s not true. Some people do enjoy it and don’t feel bad about it, but many made a mistake that they regret. My mil has counseled couples who went through infidelity and many who cheated do regret it and don’t do it again.
She had a case of infidelity with a couple that had been married 5 or 6 years, they decided to save their marriage and it’s now 20 years later and they’re still happily married. They send her a thank you card every anniversary.

It's right. No one with self respect would stay with someone who would betray then like that. No intelligent person stays with a cheater because cheaters don't just stop.

and that is an exception much more than rule....i know of sooooooooooooo many more who divorced than stayed after their partner cheated

[Vegaswife2011]

Actually. I might try and work it out. I really don’t know.

[Momto2boys973]

That is so not true. Very few things are so in our “core” that we can’t work on them. Your attitude is very fatalist in any terms of personal growth. I certainly am 100% different than I was 10, 20 years ago. Some character traits stay with me because I like those about me, so no reason to change those. But others I have worked on and better myself. Same goes for my husband, we have grown together.
The head rabbi of one of our communities here was a total party boy in his youth. He speaks openly about it. But he started studying Judaism, loved it, became an Orthodox rabbi and I’m sure he’s now not even the shadow of the guy he was back then. He may still have some character traits that he’s always had, like being fun loving and having a good time, but he now channels that differently. Being a party boy wasn’t in his “core” just as cheating isn’t in someone’s “core”. Some people may love cheating, the adrenaline rush, the excitement of something new, but then what’s in their core is that need for excitement and novelty, not the cheating itself. It can be redirected to something else. Cheating is an action, not an attitude, it can definitely be controlled if someone really wants to.

Once a cheater always a cheater. Someone who is capable of cheating once is capable of cheating again.

No one with self respect or intelligence would allow themselves to stay with someone who would do that even once.

LMAO! Once a cheater always a cheater? Because people never change, right? You are who you were 5, 10, 20 years ago, right? Please... I'm starting to wonder about your intelligence here.

At the core of who I am no I haven't changed. Someone who cheats has that in their core.

You really think it is intelligent to stay with someone who went against your wedding vows? You think it is intelligent to stay with someone who lied to you? You think it is intelligent to stay with someone who doesn't respect you? You think it is intelligent to stay with someone who risked bringing an STD or a child from another person into your marriage? Not one of those things is intelligent no matter how you try to spin it.