What do you think of this?

[Anonymous 1]

That’s tacky. They should buy the bed themselves and when asked for gift ideas, they could say something to accessorize. Like new sheets or a cool blanket.

I agree. My aunt got my cousin a bed a few years ago for Christmas and when asked about Christmas she suggested things to go with the set. Does the 6 year old even want this bed or do the parents want this bed?

I doubt the 6 year old actually cares. He's got one of those cool twin beds with the drawers underneath right now.
My mind is spinning with gift ideas.

[Anonymous 4]

I think this is a great approach to things.

And the other thing about the sister asking to not bring gifts...Maybe the sister knows that her kids have a bunch of toys and doesn't want more junk.

Personally, I appreciate when family members tell me what their kid wants. I'd rather get them something that they want or need than to buy something that I'm not sure will even be loved or used.

Oh, what’s the big deal? Maybe they want the big bed to be a family present. When my boys wanted an X-box, which they really didn’t need, I told them to pull together their birthday presents from the grandparents for it. They did it very happily. Now, could I alone have gotten it? Yes. But it was about teaching them appreciation for those big things. Maybe what they don’t want is to spoil their kid by having a bunch of presents on top of an expensive bed. So what’s the big deal to just do what they ask?

[Momto2boys973]

You just contradicted yourself. If he has a perfectly good bed then the new one is a want, not a need. And it may be something he wanted and asked for.

Oh, what’s the big deal? Maybe they want the big bed to be a family present. When my boys wanted an X-box, which they really didn’t need, I told them to pull together their birthday presents from the grandparents for it. They did it very happily. Now, could I alone have gotten it? Yes. But it was about teaching them appreciation for those big things. Maybe what they don’t want is to spoil their kid by having a bunch of presents on top of an expensive bed. So what’s the big deal to just do what they ask?

A bed is a need, not a want. And he has a perfectly good one already. It's not like he's sleeping on a mattress on the floor. He has a nice bed, they just want to upgrade. I could totally understand getting an XBox or some other type of gaming system or a new family something for the whole family and having it be one of the main gifts plus other smaller gifts that are individually theirs. I've done this several times. We bought a brand new big screen TV a couple years ago as a family gift, but I always bought the kids individual gifts also. This year I'll probably get a family gaming system.
I'm a gift giver though, I'm the only one that still gives gifts to both parents, lol. But the kids always get the same amount of gifts. The 2 6 year olds get a couple of the same gifts plus a couple individual gifts.

[HaggardWitch]

Are you sure your sister can afford a new bed? People who can afford beds don't ask their family members to buy them for them. Give your nephew a gift from you.

[Anonymous 1]

Are you sure your sister can afford a new bed? People who can afford beds don't ask their family members to buy them for them. Give your nephew a gift from you.

Most likely. They're a 2 income family, with good incomes also. They just dropped damn near 4k on a last minute vacation to Italy for 1 so if they can't afford a $200-$400 bed (They're getting it from IKEA) then it's their own damn fault.
I'm thinking about getting him a wood art set with crayons, pastels, colored pencils and a nice sketch book.

[mcginnisc]

I find this no different than a parent saying no gifts- do an experience instead.

I would have no issue with donating to the cause and then if I still felt the need, I would buy something small like candy and a gift card or something along those lines. Honestly, I much prefer that everyone give my kids gift cards or money because then they can buy what they want or save it for later. At least a bed is useful unlike legos or some other crap.

[Anonymous 3]

And if your sister says something rude to you about getting him a present other than doing what she wants you to do, I would simply look at her and say "you are an as*hole!" and then walk away.

Are you sure your sister can afford a new bed? People who can afford beds don't ask their family members to buy them for them. Give your nephew a gift from you.

Most likely. They're a 2 income family, with good incomes also. They just dropped damn near 4k on a last minute vacation to Italy for 1 so if they can't afford a $200-$400 bed (They're getting it from IKEA) then it's their own damn fault.
I'm thinking about getting him a wood art set with crayons, pastels, colored pencils and a nice sketch book.

[carterscutie85]

I'm going to be spending money regardless so I wouldn't care how it was used. I have seen friends asking for donations in lieu of gifts so they can buy memberships to various places that their kids liked and I don't think that's much different.

[Anonymous 1]

I find this no different than a parent saying no gifts- do an experience instead.

I would have no issue with donating to the cause and then if I still felt the need, I would buy something small like candy and a gift card or something along those lines. Honestly, I much prefer that everyone give my kids gift cards or money because then they can buy what they want or save it for later. At least a bed is useful unlike legos or some other crap.

No more damn legos!
LOL. I think it pisses me off so much because they never buy my kids anything for Christmas, then have the audacity to ask me to help them buy their kid a bed.
Still gonna get him something though.

[Anonymous 3]

Oh lord! What is their reasoning for not buying your kids presents??

I find this no different than a parent saying no gifts- do an experience instead.

I would have no issue with donating to the cause and then if I still felt the need, I would buy something small like candy and a gift card or something along those lines. Honestly, I much prefer that everyone give my kids gift cards or money because then they can buy what they want or save it for later. At least a bed is useful unlike legos or some other crap.

No more damn legos!
LOL. I think it pisses me off so much because they never buy my kids anything for Christmas, then have the audacity to ask me to help them buy their kid a bed.
Still gonna get him something though.