My 19 yr old is going to kill me

Pjmm
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I'm the one mostly leaving the house. I'm working. If you've got an immunosuppressed kid I could see it. But I see her point too.
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Our 22 year old is in her last year of college and going online. She's living with 4 friends in a house off campus and all of her housemates have lost their jobs (mainly serving jobs). I want her to come home and am thinking of holding the "we will pay bills". Ugh. I want her to adult but want her home and safe.
"The books that the world calls immoral are books that show its own shame." - Oscar Wilde
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MrsDavidB
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Pjmm wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 10:03 pm I'm the one mostly leaving the house. I'm working. If you've got an immunosuppressed kid I could see it. But I see her point too.
Right. I see a few replies saying if she sees her boyfriend she would NOT be allowed back in the house. My DH goes to work every day near lots of people. Should I NOT allow him back into the house after work each day?
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Anonymous 2 wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 9:57 pm
Ivegotrhythm wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 9:52 pm
Anonymous 2 wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 9:42 pm Sad that at 19 she still has to ask for your permission.
My son is only 17, but if he were 18 or older he would not need my permission to leave.

He would, however, need my permission to return.

And that would be a hard NO. He would not be bringing germs back into my house.
Handwashing, laundry, and a shower are all that are needed.
Not if he's already become infected/a carrier.

Nope.
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MrsDavidB wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 10:07 pm
Pjmm wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 10:03 pm I'm the one mostly leaving the house. I'm working. If you've got an immunosuppressed kid I could see it. But I see her point too.
Right. I see a few replies saying if she sees her boyfriend she would NOT be allowed back in the house. My DH goes to work every day near lots of people. Should I NOT allow him back into the house after work each day?
Exactly. I could see not having him over. I don't have visitors over either. But I'm seeing people every day. I'd encourage her to stay away from crowds and make her wash her hands. As long as there's no shelter in place and she's only seeing him it's really no worse than I do.
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MrsDavidB wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 9:35 pm
Anonymous 1 wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 9:31 pm She is home from college and I am not allowing her to see her boyfriend because of the lockdown. She keeps asking if he could just come over but I am taking the whole no-visitors thing pretty seriously. It doesn't seem worth it to me, she can FaceTime him and it's really just not a big deal. I have younger daughters, one who is asthmatic and one who is immunocompromised, so I don't want anyone coming here or her going there. Now I'm the devil... ugh... this will be a long however many weeks it lasts.
I've given up with my 19yo son (home from college also) He keeps hanging with his friend Matt fishing and playing soccer. Matt's parents have been home quarantining and so have we. Everyone is remaining healthy so whatever at this point.
I’m struggling with this. ODS’s friends have been sheltering in place, no one has a compromised immune system, etc, Part of me says “what’s the harm?”
Ivegotrhythm
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MrsDavidB wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 10:07 pm
Pjmm wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 10:03 pm I'm the one mostly leaving the house. I'm working. If you've got an immunosuppressed kid I could see it. But I see her point too.
Right. I see a few replies saying if she sees her boyfriend she would NOT be allowed back in the house. My DH goes to work every day near lots of people. Should I NOT allow him back into the house after work each day?
I see where you're coming from.

As it happens we were at my parents house for my son's birthday when everything shut down. So we decided to hole up here for the duration.

They are 85.

So that's where I'm coming from.

I've never been a germophobe in my life but I am now.
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Ivegotrhythm wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 10:08 pm
Anonymous 2 wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 9:57 pm
Ivegotrhythm wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 9:52 pm

My son is only 17, but if he were 18 or older he would not need my permission to leave.

He would, however, need my permission to return.

And that would be a hard NO. He would not be bringing germs back into my house.
Handwashing, laundry, and a shower are all that are needed.
Not if he's already become infected/a carrier.

Nope.
She is just as likely to be infected/a carrier as he is.
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MrsDavidB
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Ivegotrhythm wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 10:14 pm
MrsDavidB wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 10:07 pm
Pjmm wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 10:03 pm I'm the one mostly leaving the house. I'm working. If you've got an immunosuppressed kid I could see it. But I see her point too.
Right. I see a few replies saying if she sees her boyfriend she would NOT be allowed back in the house. My DH goes to work every day near lots of people. Should I NOT allow him back into the house after work each day?
I see where you're coming from.

As it happens we were at my parents house for my son's birthday when everything shut down. So we decided to hole up here for the duration.

They are 85.

So that's where I'm coming from.

I've never been a germophobe in my life but I am now.
And I see where you are coming from if nobody in your house is leaving at all. But is somebody is leaving (work) then really how safe can me and the kids be just because we are in? People have to do the best they can . I mean what else can we do.
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MrsDavidB
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Anonymous 5 wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 10:13 pm
MrsDavidB wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 9:35 pm
Anonymous 1 wrote: Wed Mar 25, 2020 9:31 pm She is home from college and I am not allowing her to see her boyfriend because of the lockdown. She keeps asking if he could just come over but I am taking the whole no-visitors thing pretty seriously. It doesn't seem worth it to me, she can FaceTime him and it's really just not a big deal. I have younger daughters, one who is asthmatic and one who is immunocompromised, so I don't want anyone coming here or her going there. Now I'm the devil... ugh... this will be a long however many weeks it lasts.
I've given up with my 19yo son (home from college also) He keeps hanging with his friend Matt fishing and playing soccer. Matt's parents have been home quarantining and so have we. Everyone is remaining healthy so whatever at this point.
I’m struggling with this. ODS’s friends have been sheltering in place, no one has a compromised immune system, etc, Part of me says “what’s the harm?”
Right. I am ok with this one friend only. If he asked to go to a party or whatever then hell no. But if it’s just them and both are healthy then 🤷‍♀️
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