Reaching out to “family”

[Msprekteacher]

I would respond to those who are making an effort. A text, a card, what ever. If spurned I wouldn’t bother any longer.

How many times would you reach out if you are continuously ignored? I don’t talk to my father or anyone on his side of the family. My cousins, my fathers older children (whom I’ve never met) my aunts and my stepmother reach out to me in some way every year. I’ve never responded for 15 years & will never respond.

Wouldn’t you have given up?

[Anonymous 1]

Was there a falling out and they're trying to make amends or apologize?

No, I never really knew them well & after I was done with my father, I was done with them too

If it was someone that I cared for and missed, someone who I felt was missing from the family, I might keep trying.
There was no definitive falling out to end the relationship, so they can't point to any reason for them being ignored. They may be confused. Where there's breath there's hope, so I can see hanging on to the thought that someone's heart might soften, when there's no clear reason for them to have cut off contact.

If it disturbs you that they continue to reach out, I'd speak to one of them and tell them you're not interested and end it.

They don’t know me to care about me. My father has left me alone and I’ve told his wife that I don’t want anything to do with any of them. It makes no sense to keep reaching out when I just ignore them.

[madfoodie]

I completely removed an aunt from my life. She is just toxic and spews hate.

[LiveWhatULove]

If it was a family reunion, I would likely send them an invite, every single year, unless there is more to the story and you specifically requested me not to. But if you were just ignoring the invites, I'd keep inviting you to let you know you are always welcome if it fits in your life and schedule now.

[Anonymous 3]

Yes. Hell, I read this post and gave up.

[Anonymous 1]

If it was a family reunion, I would likely send them an invite, every single year, unless there is more to the story and you specifically requested me not to. But if you were just ignoring the invites, I'd keep inviting you to let you know you are always welcome if it fits in your life and schedule now.

I get cards that I started writing “return to sender” messages I ignore. Texts I block. In July all the time.

[Smarties]

I don't know how many times I'd try. I've never been in that situation. But I won't scorn people for good intentions, and it seems like their intentions are probably good. If I really didn't want a relationship with them I'd just ignore the letters and move on with my day.

[Anonymous 1]

I don't know how many times I'd try. I've never been in that situation. But I won't scorn people for good intentions, and it seems like their intentions are probably good. If I really didn't want a relationship with them I'd just ignore the letters and move on with my day.

I write “return to sender” on everything I get in the mail. I just keep thinking this is the year they’ll get the hint. And it never is!

[LiveWhatULove]

If it was a family reunion, I would likely send them an invite, every single year, unless there is more to the story and you specifically requested me not to. But if you were just ignoring the invites, I'd keep inviting you to let you know you are always welcome if it fits in your life and schedule now.

I get cards that I started writing “return to sender” messages I ignore. Texts I block. In July all the time.

I don't think people know when you block them, but if I knew you specifically went to the effort to "return to sender"or basically communicating "f**k your invite". Idk, I might leave you alone OR I might keep sending them to you just to mess with you, Idk, I'd have to have all the details.

[Smarties]

I don't know how many times I'd try. I've never been in that situation. But I won't scorn people for good intentions, and it seems like their intentions are probably good. If I really didn't want a relationship with them I'd just ignore the letters and move on with my day.

I write “return to sender” on everything I get in the mail. I just keep thinking this is the year they’ll get the hint. And it never is!

So start tossing them and don't worry about it. Do you get upset over getting junk mail? It's junk mail. Toss it and move on.