Learn how to parent BM and stop calling all the time

Unread post Sat Jun 23, 2018 3:49 pm

It sounds like Mom doesn't have a whole lot of confidence in her parenting abilities. If your husband wants to help her (and disentangle himself from the day to day in the process) he should just reinforce whatever she decides when they are in her care. Your dh can talk to his ex and tell her he will back her up with the kids if they won't listen to her, but she needs to make the initial decision on what to do....(You know..."What did your mom say? Then thats what is going to happen!") Eventually, the kids will get used to Mom taking charge, and you and your dh can have some peace.

Unread post Sat Jun 23, 2018 3:51 pm

bluebunnybabe wrote: ↑Thu May 31, 2018 9:16 am If he stopped answering the phone, she would likely stop calling.

Stop being rational.

Unread post Sat Jun 23, 2018 3:55 pm

I agree that it's good for the kids to see that mom and dad are on the same page. And I think for the BIG issues, it's appropriate for mom/dad to keep each other informed. But daily calls should not be necessary. And if they are, there's something wrong.

I think these kids are learning, by mom always having to call dad, that SHE has no control over them. I don't know how old these children are; but mom better get a handle on them while they are young. Because if she doesn't do it now, when they reach their teenage years, all hell is going to break loose.

Fullxbusymom wrote: ↑Wed May 30, 2018 11:32 am I see nothing wrong with BM calling dad that their children are acting up, not doing what they're supposed to etc. I do it with my ex and he does it with me when he has them. It is good that the kids see both parents are on the same page.

Unread post Sat Jun 23, 2018 3:55 pm

That is truly awful she expects him to be an involved parent even though they're divorced.

Unread post Sat Jun 23, 2018 4:22 pm

WickedPissah wrote: ↑Sat Jun 23, 2018 3:51 pm
bluebunnybabe wrote: ↑Thu May 31, 2018 9:16 am If he stopped answering the phone, she would likely stop calling.
Stop being rational.

Sorry. Sometimes I just start typing & forget where I am.

Unread post Sat Jun 23, 2018 4:31 pm

SeekingPeace wrote: ↑Sat Jun 23, 2018 3:47 pm For all those that think it's OK that this BM frequently calls her ex-husband when she's unable to control the kids, I've got a question.

Would you like your babysitter to call you every time she can't get the kids to behave?

No. I only want to be called if shit is getting trashed or broken or someone is hurt or the house is on fire

Unread post Sat Jun 23, 2018 4:32 pm

Guest wrote: ↑Sat Jun 23, 2018 3:55 pm That is truly awful she expects him to be an involved parent even though they're divorced.

He is an involved parent by taking care of the kids 100% on HIS custody time

Unread post Sat Jun 23, 2018 4:35 pm

It's called co-parenting. You shouldn't have married a man with kids.

Unread post Sat Jun 23, 2018 4:37 pm

pinkbutterfly66 wrote: ↑Sat Jun 23, 2018 4:35 pm It's called co-parenting. You shouldn't have married a man with kids.

not true. My BFF is co parenting with her ex and probably not once has she called him during her custody time telling him her son was acting up. She just deals with it herself. She actually gets annoyed when he calls her for stupid shit during his custody time he could have handled himself.

Unread post Sat Jun 23, 2018 4:42 pm

RedBottoms wrote: ↑Sat Jun 23, 2018 4:37 pm
pinkbutterfly66 wrote: ↑Sat Jun 23, 2018 4:35 pm It's called co-parenting. You shouldn't have married a man with kids.
not true. My BFF is co parenting with her ex and probably not once has she called him during her custody time telling him her son was acting up. She just deals with it herself. She actually gets annoyed when he calls her for stupid shit during his custody time he could have handled himself.

Yes it is co-parenting, even if your bff does it differently.

Learn how to parent BM and stop calling all the time

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