Now that she had her baby SM is constantly bitching about my kids having their own rooms

[Momto2boys973]

Oh, sorry!
I really didn’t think that linking to the original post she mentioned was violating any TOS. Honest mistake!

And its gonna poof in 5....4....3...2...1
lol

The circumstances changed when the baby arrived.
But then... when you first started bitching about this in a previous post, your ex was on board with you? So what were you bitching about then? Because I seem to remember he wasn’t that on board with it then...

ETA: well, aren’t you changing your story now? I found your previous post.

My ex and his wife have never been happy about it. They think it is unfair because my kids arent even there half the time. I do understand how that is frustrating BUT he knew about the rule in the CO before they got married, he knew about the rule before her and her kids moved in. It isnt some huge surprise.

So no, your ex wasn’t on board with it.

viewtopic.php?f=11&t=7877&hilit=Teens+sharing+room+SM

SM was like 8 months pregnant at that time. So even when circumstances changed he was still insistent that the kids have their own rooms

The only thing that actually changed was the level of bitching. one person bitching shouldnt mean everything has to change.

[Anonymous 1]

Being happy with it and agreeing to it are two different things. I don't think he's been happy at all with the situation but that doesn't mean he didn't agree with them having their own rooms

Bump it please so everyone can read it

And its gonna poof in 5....4....3...2...1
lol

The circumstances changed when the baby arrived.
But then... when you first started bitching about this in a previous post, your ex was on board with you? So what were you bitching about then? Because I seem to remember he wasn’t that on board with it then...

ETA: well, aren’t you changing your story now? I found your previous post.

My ex and his wife have never been happy about it. They think it is unfair because my kids arent even there half the time. I do understand how that is frustrating BUT he knew about the rule in the CO before they got married, he knew about the rule before her and her kids moved in. It isnt some huge surprise.

So no, your ex wasn’t on board with it.

viewtopic.php?f=11&t=7877&hilit=Teens+sharing+room+SM

SM was like 8 months pregnant at that time. So even when circumstances changed he was still insistent that the kids have their own rooms

The only thing that actually changed was the level of bitching. one person bitching shouldnt mean everything has to change.

[Traci_Momof2]

How far apart do you and your ex live? Is it half an hour or less of driving time?

Honestly, I think the best thing for the kids would be if you could petition to have sole custody in that they always live with you. Your ex could still have time with them, spend evenings with them or the whole day on the weekend, and just have them home to your house at the end of the night.
I don't say that because I'm siding with you necessarily. But kids, even teens need one place they call home. That one place that is theirs, that they feel safe. Kids don't need to playing musical homes every week. And like I said, they can still spend plenty of time with their dad, it's just that spending time with him doesn't require sleeping at his house.

I honestly feel for kids who are part of a 50/50 custody agreement and have to be schlepped back and forth all the time. Sounds miserable if you ask me.

[BionicBunny]

Do you see the tension created over something so silly. You said before that she was asking nicely. Now you and your kids have gotten her to this point where she is seeing them as spoiled brats. That’s the tension I was talking about. You helped create it now fix it.

SM cant sit down and have a conversation about it without her calling and the kids names.

My kids dont want to share a room with young children they barely know and that is okay

What a great opportunity for your kids to form a close relationship with their step siblings. I’m sure the preschool age kids are sleeping through the night.
When you don’t yeah your kids compromise you are helping to create that strain. The three of you need to be adults and sit together and make a decision on the kids. No matter how much your kids complain stick with it.

There are my two kids 15 year old boy and 16 year old girl. SM has four kids from previous relationships and the new baby that her and my ex share.

My kids are not close with their step siblings. They are toddlers/ preschool age. As far as I know some are still not sleeping all the way through the night.

If it was up to them they would go to their dads and just come to my house to sleep but he isnt okay with that. I havent created anything. SM is creating that strain.

[Momto2boys973]

I agree it must be a terrible way to grow up. I don’t know if living with just one parent is any better, though.
However, in this particular case, I think it will be more detrimental. OP is already pretty much flirting with the parental alienation line by egging her kids on with being angry at their dad and SM. Imagine what she will do if now she’s the one with full control over the children. It wouldn’t surprise me if those kids never want to see their dad again.

How far apart do you and your ex live? Is it half an hour or less of driving time?

Honestly, I think the best thing for the kids would be if you could petition to have sole custody in that they always live with you. Your ex could still have time with them, spend evenings with them or the whole day on the weekend, and just have them home to your house at the end of the night.
I don't say that because I'm siding with you necessarily. But kids, even teens need one place they call home. That one place that is theirs, that they feel safe. Kids don't need to playing musical homes every week. And like I said, they can still spend plenty of time with their dad, it's just that spending time with him doesn't require sleeping at his house.

I honestly feel for kids who are part of a 50/50 custody agreement and have to be schlepped back and forth all the time. Sounds miserable if you ask me.

[Anonymous 1]

She saw them as spoiled brats from the day she moved into the house. Asking nicely after talking shit for a long time doesnt mean she was actually being nice. She was just using the words please and thank you instead of calling me a bitch and my kids douchebags

Do you see the tension created over something so silly. You said before that she was asking nicely. Now you and your kids have gotten her to this point where she is seeing them as spoiled brats. That’s the tension I was talking about. You helped create it now fix it.

SM cant sit down and have a conversation about it without her calling and the kids names.

My kids dont want to share a room with young children they barely know and that is okay

What a great opportunity for your kids to form a close relationship with their step siblings. I’m sure the preschool age kids are sleeping through the night.
When you don’t yeah your kids compromise you are helping to create that strain. The three of you need to be adults and sit together and make a decision on the kids. No matter how much your kids complain stick with it.

[Anonymous 1]

It is a 10 minute drive.

If it was up to the kids they would go to dads when they normally do and come to my house to sleep. He isnt okay with that so going to court is the only way to make any changes.

How far apart do you and your ex live? Is it half an hour or less of driving time?

Honestly, I think the best thing for the kids would be if you could petition to have sole custody in that they always live with you. Your ex could still have time with them, spend evenings with them or the whole day on the weekend, and just have them home to your house at the end of the night.
I don't say that because I'm siding with you necessarily. But kids, even teens need one place they call home. That one place that is theirs, that they feel safe. Kids don't need to playing musical homes every week. And like I said, they can still spend plenty of time with their dad, it's just that spending time with him doesn't require sleeping at his house.

I honestly feel for kids who are part of a 50/50 custody agreement and have to be schlepped back and forth all the time. Sounds miserable if you ask me.

[Anonymous 1]

Actually my kids have liked it until the past year

There is no parental alienation going on. Stop being dramatic. They will always want to see their dad he isnt the problem

I agree it must be a terrible way to grow up. I don’t know if living with just one parent is any better, though.
However, in this particular case, I think it will be more detrimental. OP is already pretty much flirting with the parental alienation line by egging her kids on with being angry at their dad and SM. Imagine what she will do if now she’s the one with full control over the children. It wouldn’t surprise me if those kids never want to see their dad again.

How far apart do you and your ex live? Is it half an hour or less of driving time?

Honestly, I think the best thing for the kids would be if you could petition to have sole custody in that they always live with you. Your ex could still have time with them, spend evenings with them or the whole day on the weekend, and just have them home to your house at the end of the night.
I don't say that because I'm siding with you necessarily. But kids, even teens need one place they call home. That one place that is theirs, that they feel safe. Kids don't need to playing musical homes every week. And like I said, they can still spend plenty of time with their dad, it's just that spending time with him doesn't require sleeping at his house.

I honestly feel for kids who are part of a 50/50 custody agreement and have to be schlepped back and forth all the time. Sounds miserable if you ask me.

[Momto2boys973]

No, they’re not different things. Because this sounds more like not being happy but being FORCED to agree to it. I seriously doubt he was insistent because he agreed with it. He probably was insistent because he knew how vengeful you are and that you’ll take him to court if he didn’t.

Being happy with it and agreeing to it are two different things. I don't think he's been happy at all with the situation but that doesn't mean he didn't agree with them having their own rooms

Bump it please so everyone can read it

And its gonna poof in 5....4....3...2...1
lol

The circumstances changed when the baby arrived.
But then... when you first started bitching about this in a previous post, your ex was on board with you? So what were you bitching about then? Because I seem to remember he wasn’t that on board with it then...

ETA: well, aren’t you changing your story now? I found your previous post.



So no, your ex wasn’t on board with it.

viewtopic.php?f=11&t=7877&hilit=Teens+sharing+room+SM

[Valentina327]

Because really? “The judge says it’s unfair they have to share a room!” Oh, poor babies. You should tell them to make a little sacrifice when they’re there instead of furthering their anger and now threatening to take full custody.
Do you honestly think it’s better for your kids to fuel more resentment against their dad and his new family? You could end all trouble if you just talk to your kids about accommodating to the circumstances. But no. You prefer to take the fight further over something so stupid.

There’s nothing like using the kids as pawns in the war against the ex...

How am I using them as pawns? You never make any sense

This exactly. They're not even there 50% of the time. It's ridiculous and entitled and OP clearly is just doing it to grind away at the new wife.

There are children that live in a house full time with both parents with intact families that share rooms. There's nothing tragic about it.