Now that she had her baby SM is constantly bitching about my kids having their own rooms

[Anonymous 5]

[Anonymous 1]

One boy one girl.

Isn’t this two teen boys? Is there a third child, a girl?
If the father helped create this problem then all of you need to sit down and he needs to help create a solution and he can break it to the kids.

I didnt create this on my own. My ex up until SM started bitching felt strongly about them having their own rooms. Even when she was moving her kids in he was clear that his kids still go their own rooms.

So it isnt just on me. There is nothing wrong with a teen boy and girl not wanting to share a room together. There is nothing wrong with teens not wanting to share rooms with young children.

They arent ungrateful for wanting to keep the rooms they have had their whole lives

Well they are being ungrateful brats. You know it and I bet they do too. I bet they are enjoying having that power over a decision that affects her and her kids. Congratulations on what you created.

[Anonymous 1]

Having the kids use their rooms when they are gone is a compromise. SM is not willing to compromise at all. She will either bitch if they have their own rooms or she wants them to share.

Then you need to help them through that by not building their expectations up to having everything they want and not budging on compromising and letting them get whatever they want there. Of course it’s going to put a strain of their relationship with SM. I’m sure that’s just how you would like to see it go but it isn’t helping them it’s hurting them.

Keep helping them to find reasons to not like it at dad's house. Eventually, they won't want to go. And you will win.

Feel better?

They like their dads house. They are not liking their step mom.

[BionicBunny]

So what’s the situation here? They want the teen girl to share with the teen boy? I would say no to that, but... if they have a younger child there needing to share with one of the teens, like a younger boy share with the teen boy or a younger girl share with the teen girl then that’s the solution right there. And as a compromise they can ask to spend less time there so they don’t have to share a room 50% of the time. If it’s that big of a deal. Either way, there needs to be a compromise met and you need to let this happen and stop fighting the SM and their dad over this. You are creating a strain on your kids relationship with their dad. That strain can go into adulthood and trust me when they are adults it doesn’t matter if they shared a room with a sibling as a kid. Are you willing to risk your kids relationship with their father and just spoil your kids to where they can’t cope in the real world when they are adults? Do something that will really benefit your kids and teach them compromise.

One boy one girl.

Isn’t this two teen boys? Is there a third child, a girl?
If the father helped create this problem then all of you need to sit down and he needs to help create a solution and he can break it to the kids.

I didnt create this on my own. My ex up until SM started bitching felt strongly about them having their own rooms. Even when she was moving her kids in he was clear that his kids still go their own rooms.

So it isnt just on me. There is nothing wrong with a teen boy and girl not wanting to share a room together. There is nothing wrong with teens not wanting to share rooms with young children.

They arent ungrateful for wanting to keep the rooms they have had their whole lives

[BionicBunny]

That’s only 50% of the time that they are gone. How do you think that’s going to work? No it needs to be something stable and not just half the time.
List what kids are in the home. Hers and yours and their ages.

Having the kids use their rooms when they are gone is a compromise. SM is not willing to compromise at all. She will either bitch if they have their own rooms or she wants them to share.

Then you need to help them through that by not building their expectations up to having everything they want and not budging on compromising and letting them get whatever they want there. Of course it’s going to put a strain of their relationship with SM. I’m sure that’s just how you would like to see it go but it isn’t helping them it’s hurting them.

They like their dads house. They are not liking their step mom.

[Foreverme123]

Why would she even get with a man she knew had kids and particular requirements that prevented her from having the life she wanted? I swear, some women are just in love with the idea of being married and don't want to wait for a compatible partner.

[Anonymous 1]

There are my two kids 15 year old boy and 16 year old girl. SM has four kids from previous relationships and the new baby that her and my ex share.

My kids are not close with their step siblings. They are toddlers/ preschool age. As far as I know some are still not sleeping all the way through the night.

If it was up to them they would go to their dads and just come to my house to sleep but he isnt okay with that. I havent created anything. SM is creating that strain.

So what’s the situation here? They want the teen girl to share with the teen boy? I would say no to that, but... if they have a younger child there needing to share with one of the teens, like a younger boy share with the teen boy or a younger girl share with the teen girl then that’s the solution right there. And as a compromise they can ask to spend less time there so they don’t have to share a room 50% of the time. If it’s that big of a deal. Either way, there needs to be a compromise met and you need to let this happen and stop fighting the SM and their dad over this. You are creating a strain on your kids relationship with their dad. That strain can go into adulthood and trust me when they are adults it doesn’t matter if they shared a room with a sibling as a kid. Are you willing to risk your kids relationship with their father and just spoil your kids to where they can’t cope in the real world when they are adults? Do something that will really benefit your kids and teach them compromise.

One boy one girl.

Isn’t this two teen boys? Is there a third child, a girl?
If the father helped create this problem then all of you need to sit down and he needs to help create a solution and he can break it to the kids.

[BionicBunny]

What a great opportunity for your kids to form a close relationship with their step siblings. I’m sure the preschool age kids are sleeping through the night.
When you don’t yeah your kids compromise you are helping to create that strain. The three of you need to be adults and sit together and make a decision on the kids. No matter how much your kids complain stick with it.

There are my two kids 15 year old boy and 16 year old girl. SM has four kids from previous relationships and the new baby that her and my ex share.

My kids are not close with their step siblings. They are toddlers/ preschool age. As far as I know some are still not sleeping all the way through the night.

If it was up to them they would go to their dads and just come to my house to sleep but he isnt okay with that. I havent created anything. SM is creating that strain.

So what’s the situation here? They want the teen girl to share with the teen boy? I would say no to that, but... if they have a younger child there needing to share with one of the teens, like a younger boy share with the teen boy or a younger girl share with the teen girl then that’s the solution right there. And as a compromise they can ask to spend less time there so they don’t have to share a room 50% of the time. If it’s that big of a deal. Either way, there needs to be a compromise met and you need to let this happen and stop fighting the SM and their dad over this. You are creating a strain on your kids relationship with their dad. That strain can go into adulthood and trust me when they are adults it doesn’t matter if they shared a room with a sibling as a kid. Are you willing to risk your kids relationship with their father and just spoil your kids to where they can’t cope in the real world when they are adults? Do something that will really benefit your kids and teach them compromise.

One boy one girl.

[Anonymous 1]

SM cant sit down and have a conversation about it without her calling and the kids names.

My kids dont want to share a room with young children they barely know and that is okay

What a great opportunity for your kids to form a close relationship with their step siblings. I’m sure the preschool age kids are sleeping through the night.
When you don’t yeah your kids compromise you are helping to create that strain. The three of you need to be adults and sit together and make a decision on the kids. No matter how much your kids complain stick with it.

There are my two kids 15 year old boy and 16 year old girl. SM has four kids from previous relationships and the new baby that her and my ex share.

My kids are not close with their step siblings. They are toddlers/ preschool age. As far as I know some are still not sleeping all the way through the night.

If it was up to them they would go to their dads and just come to my house to sleep but he isnt okay with that. I havent created anything. SM is creating that strain.

So what’s the situation here? They want the teen girl to share with the teen boy? I would say no to that, but... if they have a younger child there needing to share with one of the teens, like a younger boy share with the teen boy or a younger girl share with the teen girl then that’s the solution right there. And as a compromise they can ask to spend less time there so they don’t have to share a room 50% of the time. If it’s that big of a deal. Either way, there needs to be a compromise met and you need to let this happen and stop fighting the SM and their dad over this. You are creating a strain on your kids relationship with their dad. That strain can go into adulthood and trust me when they are adults it doesn’t matter if they shared a room with a sibling as a kid. Are you willing to risk your kids relationship with their father and just spoil your kids to where they can’t cope in the real world when they are adults? Do something that will really benefit your kids and teach them compromise.

[Anonymous 3]

What a great opportunity for your kids to form a close relationship with their step siblings. I’m sure the preschool age kids are sleeping through the night.
When you don’t yeah your kids compromise you are helping to create that strain. The three of you need to be adults and sit together and make a decision on the kids. No matter how much your kids complain stick with it.

There are my two kids 15 year old boy and 16 year old girl. SM has four kids from previous relationships and the new baby that her and my ex share.

My kids are not close with their step siblings. They are toddlers/ preschool age. As far as I know some are still not sleeping all the way through the night.

If it was up to them they would go to their dads and just come to my house to sleep but he isnt okay with that. I havent created anything. SM is creating that strain.

So what’s the situation here? They want the teen girl to share with the teen boy? I would say no to that, but... if they have a younger child there needing to share with one of the teens, like a younger boy share with the teen boy or a younger girl share with the teen girl then that’s the solution right there. And as a compromise they can ask to spend less time there so they don’t have to share a room 50% of the time. If it’s that big of a deal. Either way, there needs to be a compromise met and you need to let this happen and stop fighting the SM and their dad over this. You are creating a strain on your kids relationship with their dad. That strain can go into adulthood and trust me when they are adults it doesn’t matter if they shared a room with a sibling as a kid. Are you willing to risk your kids relationship with their father and just spoil your kids to where they can’t cope in the real world when they are adults? Do something that will really benefit your kids and teach them compromise.

My parents had 7 children. We all shared - and my brothers were all 3 in a room together. Sure I'd have liked to have had my own room at the time, but I'd much rather have all my siblings than my own bedroom when I was a kid. And you're right, now it doesn't matter at all.