Would it bother you if?

[queenofmycastle]

Wow! That sucks. Sorry to hear that. Most men aren't that bold.

He's not the only man I've dated that brought his side piece around me. My 3rd bf after our divorce was F***ing around with a girl at work. He'd come home and tell me all these negative things abt her (l.e. she's kinda stupid, she's homely looking, and kinda just ugly.) then she showed up at his house where I'd been staying for a few months and she had a friend of ours with her so knew we were 2gthr and I was living there. I even went outside in my robe with exbf's dd who I was helping to raise in my arms and sdd even said "mommy, who is that lady taking to daddy?"

He acted angry that our friend brought her to "our" home. Then everything seemed normal for a week or so. Then I was helping him set up something on his phone even he got a text that said "you're so sweet which makes you even cuter." So I of course opened the text and it was a short thread but what was there was a pic of her and a response from him saying "God you are so beautiful." I flipped out and he said that her dh had just left her and she was feeling unattractive etc and thats the only reason he even responded. He gave me that Bs about I love you and don't want anyone else.

Well about a week later SDD, DS, and I decided to go to my parents and hang out bc exbf needed a nap bc he'd pulled a dbl shift. That was fine, I only asked he pick us up by x time so I could come home and make dinner. That time comes and goes with no (we'll call him dbag) signs of ďbag. I called the house phone and his cell with no response. I assumed he was still sleeping and didn't heart the phone. So I used my mom's car to go wake him up to come get me and the kids as I had no car seats.

I was driving past a bar that we went to a lot and guess who's car is in the PL? Yup, that's right. Dbags car was. I knew something wasn't right so I stopped and went in. I found him sitting at a table with HER!!!!! He swore up and down it was a coincidence that she was there. However, 1 they were holding hands. 2 I had taken his phone when I caught him and seen that as soon as he dropped me oft that decided to go meet for drinks.

I was pissed and dumped him immediately. He immediately moved her in. SDD was 3 at the time and would scream and cry for her mommy (that was me bc her mom was a meth addict and exbf had custody and I was raising her as my own but didn't push our even encourage the mommy thing.) for hours a day everyday for a few weeks. I was heartbroken and felt like my child was taken from me.

Some men are just bottom of the barrel scum.

Wow. He was definitely a piece of trash! Who does that to someone that's raising their daughter?! Ugh. Yes, some men are scum, but not all. My ex-husband was a cheater, and I stayed longer than I should have. We didn't have kids together, but he convinced me that his cheating was somehow my fault. I left, finally, and my now husband is an amazing man! There are some good men out there, but you have to watch out for the jerks.

My now dh is my amazing man. He might be an ass at times but he's my ass and he doesn't and wouldn't cheat. His free time from work is spent with me and our kids.

[famousglm714]

I would not be into it. I can't tell you how many couples I know in real life who started out as work friends or supposed best friends. Even my DH started as a friend when I was dating a real loser, lol. It just never occurs to me to meet straight new male friends. Or any new friends really, haha. Unnecessary for me. It just seems inappropriate to me and I would not be thrilled with it. We've done the whole poly thing and stuff like that so I'm not coming from a place of jealously. I'm just not going to sit back and watch DH have an affair/emotional affair while I'm left in the dust. Bring her home for me at least, LOL.

[queenofmycastle]

Wow! That sucks. Sorry to hear that. Most men aren't that bold.

He's not the only man I've dated that brought his side piece around me. My 3rd bf after our divorce was F***ing around with a girl at work. He'd come home and tell me all these negative things abt her (l.e. she's kinda stupid, she's homely looking, and kinda just ugly.) then she showed up at his house where I'd been staying for a few months and she had a friend of ours with her so knew we were 2gthr and I was living there. I even went outside in my robe with exbf's dd who I was helping to raise in my arms and sdd even said "mommy, who is that lady taking to daddy?"

He acted angry that our friend brought her to "our" home. Then everything seemed normal for a week or so. Then I was helping him set up something on his phone even he got a text that said "you're so sweet which makes you even cuter." So I of course opened the text and it was a short thread but what was there was a pic of her and a response from him saying "God you are so beautiful." I flipped out and he said that her dh had just left her and she was feeling unattractive etc and thats the only reason he even responded. He gave me that Bs about I love you and don't want anyone else.

Well about a week later SDD, DS, and I decided to go to my parents and hang out bc exbf needed a nap bc he'd pulled a dbl shift. That was fine, I only asked he pick us up by x time so I could come home and make dinner. That time comes and goes with no (we'll call him dbag) signs of ďbag. I called the house phone and his cell with no response. I assumed he was still sleeping and didn't heart the phone. So I used my mom's car to go wake him up to come get me and the kids as I had no car seats.

I was driving past a bar that we went to a lot and guess who's car is in the PL? Yup, that's right. Dbags car was. I knew something wasn't right so I stopped and went in. I found him sitting at a table with HER!!!!! He swore up and down it was a coincidence that she was there. However, 1 they were holding hands. 2 I had taken his phone when I caught him and seen that as soon as he dropped me oft that decided to go meet for drinks.

I was pissed and dumped him immediately. He immediately moved her in. SDD was 3 at the time and would scream and cry for her mommy (that was me bc her mom was a meth addict and exbf had custody and I was raising her as my own but didn't push our even encourage the mommy thing.) for hours a day everyday for a few weeks. I was heartbroken and felt like my child was taken from me.

Some men are just bottom of the barrel scum.

Wow. He was definitely a piece of trash! Who does that to someone that's raising their daughter?! Ugh. Yes, some men are scum, but not all. My ex-husband was a cheater, and I stayed longer than I should have. We didn't have kids together, but he convinced me that his cheating was somehow my fault. I left, finally, and my now husband is an amazing man! There are some good men out there, but you have to watch out for the jerks.

The whole situation was fucked from the get go. The dd's mom was my BFF for 13yrs at that point. I was friends with him and he seemed amazing. We started dating after she took his dd and ran off with a dope dealer in the middle of the night. When she found out we were together, that's when she brought his dd to see him. She'd only do exchanges if I was present. Eventually she got strung out and I myself told her that dd wasn't leaving with her. She didn't fight it. Eventually I became mommy. When ex left me for the other girl I thought I'd lost my dd forever. Thankfully mom got pregnant and got clean and then dad started using again and somehow caused his new wife to have a mental break down to the point she spent 6 months in a psych ward. So mom got custody and then I got to see her anytime I wanted. She even still called me mom still and bm had no problems with it.

Then she got strung out again and I tried to get custody of her before cps stepped in bc she'd already lost 2 of her 4 dd's due to her 3rd testing positive for meth. I had my home redone to accommodate 2 adults 2 boys (mine) and 3 girls (1 MY DD *hers biologically but mine because I'd raised her, also her 1 yr old that was my god child and her newborn. But dhs denied us because our house was too small and DH had a 10 yo felony. That killed me but nothing I could do about it.

She Eventually got her oldest back bc she was with her BF and went on to have anther dd. 3 yrs later she called me crying, she had moved out of state and started using again. She was homeless and she needed me to drive 10 hours one way bc she was giving me guardianship of her then youngest that she had custody of. Of course I said yes and so did dh bc we helped raise the younger kids and the one she had called dh daddy anyways.

We found a sitter, did maintenance on the truck, got clothes for an overnight stay filled the tank etc. ... just to never hear from her again.

6 months later friends mom called me to tell me that bm had sent my god daughter 5 hours north of where they lived. To live with a 23yo girl my barely knew.

By this time we'd berm bffs for 20 yrs. I ended it immediately. She broke my heart with her choices and upset my dh to the point he was in tears due to fear of something happening to a child that we helped raise too.

[carterscutie85]

No. Being *friends* is how a lot of affairs start. I have seen it so many times. I'm not saying it would happen, just that people change and it could.

[agander2017]

He's not the only man I've dated that brought his side piece around me. My 3rd bf after our divorce was F***ing around with a girl at work. He'd come home and tell me all these negative things abt her (l.e. she's kinda stupid, she's homely looking, and kinda just ugly.) then she showed up at his house where I'd been staying for a few months and she had a friend of ours with her so knew we were 2gthr and I was living there. I even went outside in my robe with exbf's dd who I was helping to raise in my arms and sdd even said "mommy, who is that lady taking to daddy?"

He acted angry that our friend brought her to "our" home. Then everything seemed normal for a week or so. Then I was helping him set up something on his phone even he got a text that said "you're so sweet which makes you even cuter." So I of course opened the text and it was a short thread but what was there was a pic of her and a response from him saying "God you are so beautiful." I flipped out and he said that her dh had just left her and she was feeling unattractive etc and thats the only reason he even responded. He gave me that Bs about I love you and don't want anyone else.

Well about a week later SDD, DS, and I decided to go to my parents and hang out bc exbf needed a nap bc he'd pulled a dbl shift. That was fine, I only asked he pick us up by x time so I could come home and make dinner. That time comes and goes with no (we'll call him dbag) signs of ďbag. I called the house phone and his cell with no response. I assumed he was still sleeping and didn't heart the phone. So I used my mom's car to go wake him up to come get me and the kids as I had no car seats.

I was driving past a bar that we went to a lot and guess who's car is in the PL? Yup, that's right. Dbags car was. I knew something wasn't right so I stopped and went in. I found him sitting at a table with HER!!!!! He swore up and down it was a coincidence that she was there. However, 1 they were holding hands. 2 I had taken his phone when I caught him and seen that as soon as he dropped me oft that decided to go meet for drinks.

I was pissed and dumped him immediately. He immediately moved her in. SDD was 3 at the time and would scream and cry for her mommy (that was me bc her mom was a meth addict and exbf had custody and I was raising her as my own but didn't push our even encourage the mommy thing.) for hours a day everyday for a few weeks. I was heartbroken and felt like my child was taken from me.

Some men are just bottom of the barrel scum.

Wow. He was definitely a piece of trash! Who does that to someone that's raising their daughter?! Ugh. Yes, some men are scum, but not all. My ex-husband was a cheater, and I stayed longer than I should have. We didn't have kids together, but he convinced me that his cheating was somehow my fault. I left, finally, and my now husband is an amazing man! There are some good men out there, but you have to watch out for the jerks.

The whole situation was fucked from the get go. The dd's mom was my BFF for 13yrs at that point. I was friends with him and he seemed amazing. We started dating after she took his dd and ran off with a dope dealer in the middle of the night. When she found out we were together, that's when she brought his dd to see him. She'd only do exchanges if I was present. Eventually she got strung out and I myself told her that dd wasn't leaving with her. She didn't fight it. Eventually I became mommy. When ex left me for the other girl I thought I'd lost my dd forever. Thankfully mom got pregnant and got clean and then dad started using again and somehow caused his new wife to have a mental break down to the point she spent 6 months in a psych ward. So mom got custody and then I got to see her anytime I wanted. She even still called me mom still and bm had no problems with it.

Then she got strung out again and I tried to get custody of her before cps stepped in bc she'd already lost 2 of her 4 dd's due to her 3rd testing positive for meth. I had my home redone to accommodate 2 adults 2 boys (mine) and 3 girls (1 MY DD *hers biologically but mine because I'd raised her, also her 1 yr old that was my god child and her newborn. But dhs denied us because our house was too small and DH had a 10 yo felony. That killed me but nothing I could do about it.

She Eventually got her oldest back bc she was with her BF and went on to have anther dd. 3 yrs later she called me crying, she had moved out of state and started using again. She was homeless and she needed me to drive 10 hours one way bc she was giving me guardianship of her then youngest that she had custody of. Of course I said yes and so did dh bc we helped raise the younger kids and the one she had called dh daddy anyways.

We found a sitter, did maintenance on the truck, got clothes for an overnight stay filled the tank etc. ... just to never hear from her again.

6 months later friends mom called me to tell me that bm had sent my god daughter 5 hours north of where they lived. To live with a 23yo girl my barely knew.

By this time we'd berm bffs for 20 yrs. I ended it immediately. She broke my heart with her choices and upset my dh to the point he was in tears due to fear of something happening to a child that we helped raise too.

Wow, that really is a messed up situation. I hope the little girls are okay. They are the ones that are suffering most in this situation.

[mater-three]

No...

[queenofmycastle]

Wow. He was definitely a piece of trash! Who does that to someone that's raising their daughter?! Ugh. Yes, some men are scum, but not all. My ex-husband was a cheater, and I stayed longer than I should have. We didn't have kids together, but he convinced me that his cheating was somehow my fault. I left, finally, and my now husband is an amazing man! There are some good men out there, but you have to watch out for the jerks.

The whole situation was fucked from the get go. The dd's mom was my BFF for 13yrs at that point. I was friends with him and he seemed amazing. We started dating after she took his dd and ran off with a dope dealer in the middle of the night. When she found out we were together, that's when she brought his dd to see him. She'd only do exchanges if I was present. Eventually she got strung out and I myself told her that dd wasn't leaving with her. She didn't fight it. Eventually I became mommy. When ex left me for the other girl I thought I'd lost my dd forever. Thankfully mom got pregnant and got clean and then dad started using again and somehow caused his new wife to have a mental break down to the point she spent 6 months in a psych ward. So mom got custody and then I got to see her anytime I wanted. She even still called me mom still and bm had no problems with it.

Then she got strung out again and I tried to get custody of her before cps stepped in bc she'd already lost 2 of her 4 dd's due to her 3rd testing positive for meth. I had my home redone to accommodate 2 adults 2 boys (mine) and 3 girls (1 MY DD *hers biologically but mine because I'd raised her, also her 1 yr old that was my god child and her newborn. But dhs denied us because our house was too small and DH had a 10 yo felony. That killed me but nothing I could do about it.

She Eventually got her oldest back bc she was with her BF and went on to have anther dd. 3 yrs later she called me crying, she had moved out of state and started using again. She was homeless and she needed me to drive 10 hours one way bc she was giving me guardianship of her then youngest that she had custody of. Of course I said yes and so did dh bc we helped raise the younger kids and the one she had called dh daddy anyways.

We found a sitter, did maintenance on the truck, got clothes for an overnight stay filled the tank etc. ... just to never hear from her again.

6 months later friends mom called me to tell me that bm had sent my god daughter 5 hours north of where they lived. To live with a 23yo girl my barely knew.

By this time we'd berm bffs for 20 yrs. I ended it immediately. She broke my heart with her choices and upset my dh to the point he was in tears due to fear of something happening to a child that we helped raise too.

Wow, that really is a messed up situation. I hope the little girls are okay. They are the ones that are suffering most in this situation.

They were 1 and a newborn so they Def don't remember her. Now her odd and ydd, I don't know. I haven't had contact with ex bff in a year this month.