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New Here and would love advice

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Joined: Fri Sep 14, 2018 1:57 am

Unread post Fri Sep 14, 2018 2:26 am

I have 2 boys ages 2 and 8 and I’m newly single I only moved out a few months ago and we are starting the divorce process

Their father and I get along well we tried to work things out for way too long but we both knew we were done. There was no cheating or hard feelings

I’m trying to get used to being separated from my boys every other weekend.

The boys are adjusting well but I’m having trouble getting used to it and feeling some loneliness and separation anxiety

This is my first time not having a full house so it’s hitting me harder than I thought it would

It takes a lot for me to not call or text and check up on them

I know they are safe with their dad but I am nervous that something will happen and I won’t be able to be there for them

Anyone else feel that way in the beginning? How do you get over that feeling?
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Murdoc's Mistress
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Unread post Sun Sep 16, 2018 11:37 am

I think with all the activity in the main boards, people tend to overlook the sub-forums.

I'm afraid I can't offer much advice from experience. After I divorced, the man disappeared for over a decade and only recently started communicating with our dd (she had to initiate it). She has never spent a weekend with him.

I'd say just remember that the kids are safe. Perhaps this was also be a good time to look into girls' nights out with some girlfriends. Doesn't have to be clubbing or bar scenes, even just a nice place to catch a meal with friends and enjoy the atmosphere.
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Unread post Fri Sep 21, 2018 3:20 pm

I found I needed to keep myself busy. It was so hard and lonely being away from them at first. I understand completely how you feel. He no longer sees the kids but in the beginning when he did I had never been away from them a day in their lives so it was very hard.
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Unread post Mon Sep 24, 2018 2:11 pm

It is an adjustment. I have always been the person who had hobbies and interests out side of the house. Serious hobbies, so I would just fill my time pursuing those things. I love hearing about your healthy separation. Not the fact its happening obviously, but that you are kind and compassionate to one another. Bore me with stories like this all day.
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