Anyone stayed married to a sociopath?

Concerned anonymous

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I think my husband is a sociopath. He’s not violent, he doesn’t kill people or animals and he’s not physically abusive but looking over everything I have read today it seems like he may be a sociopath.

I’ve pretty much made up my mind to divorce him, I’m just getting everything set so I can and thankfully we don’t have children together but there is still part of me that wants to stay. When things are good they are really good. But when things are bad, and that’s often, it’s a roller coaster of emotions and I’m not sure I want to stick around.

It’s also sad to think of my marriage ending. When I got married I meant it, forever. But I also didn’t know about his mental disorders.

I’ve also been speaking to my preacher. And I think he’s a great guy and would not steer me wrong. I told him I was thinking of leaving and he said, in not so many words, that I should.

So here I am pretending around my husband that everything is good so as to not cause a fight or let on what I’m planning. While I plan my ‘escape’
cellomom26
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I would definitely leave ASAP.

My parents are both narcissists. They have zero empathy, are great manipulators, and wanted complete control of me as an adult. I cut all contact with them 10 years ago and finally have peace.

Run fast, do not walk. Do not hesitate.

Best wishes to you. :-)
CMrefugee
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Hmm. No mention from your preacher about some sort of counseling? Does your husband also attend this church?
Original anon

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CMrefugee wrote: Mon May 21, 2018 4:25 pm Hmm. No mention from your preacher about some sort of counseling? Does your husband also attend this church?
He did suggest counseling which I have done, dh also saw a therapist but only went 3 times. He’s also counseled us as a couple and individually as well. He also suggested alanon for me and aa for him.

Yes my husband also attends the same church
Madwifa
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Mine is just super bi polar but i think hes just crazy
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admin
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When I got married I meant it, forever.
I feel this is something many of us tell ourselves at some point in the hopes that others realize our good intentions in life, and in a sense, in the hope that things don't go wrong. I've told myself this a lot of times too. The reality is though that it's never really like that. Sometimes it simply won't work and that's OK.

Everyone has ups and downs in life and it's hard to be in a situation where you can't be your authentic self around a significant other because things are in an awkward state.

*Hugs* Things will get better soon.
"It's not what you look at that matters, it's what you see."
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MrsDavidB
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cellomom26 wrote: Mon May 21, 2018 3:39 pm I would definitely leave ASAP.

My parents are both narcissists. They have zero empathy, are great manipulators, and wanted complete control of me as an adult. I cut all contact with them 10 years ago and finally have peace.

Run fast, do not walk. Do not hesitate.

Best wishes to you. :-)
Hey nice to see you here!
CMrefugee
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Original anon wrote: Mon May 21, 2018 4:40 pm
CMrefugee wrote: Mon May 21, 2018 4:25 pm Hmm. No mention from your preacher about some sort of counseling? Does your husband also attend this church?
He did suggest counseling which I have done, dh also saw a therapist but only went 3 times. He’s also counseled us as a couple and individually as well. He also suggested alanon for me and aa for him.

Yes my husband also attends the same church
Well damn. It seems you've already put in the effort... =( Best of luck to you.
Anon op

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CMrefugee wrote: Mon May 21, 2018 4:58 pm
Original anon wrote: Mon May 21, 2018 4:40 pm
CMrefugee wrote: Mon May 21, 2018 4:25 pm Hmm. No mention from your preacher about some sort of counseling? Does your husband also attend this church?
He did suggest counseling which I have done, dh also saw a therapist but only went 3 times. He’s also counseled us as a couple and individually as well. He also suggested alanon for me and aa for him.

Yes my husband also attends the same church
Well damn. It seems you've already put in the effort... =( Best of luck to you.
Yes, and the fact that that our preacher is behind me leaving makes me see this is serious and not me just being upset over little things that I should work through.
Anon op

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admin wrote: Mon May 21, 2018 4:55 pm
When I got married I meant it, forever.
I feel this is something many of us tell ourselves at some point in the hopes that others realize our good intentions in life, and in a sense, in the hope that things don't go wrong. I've told myself this a lot of times too. The reality is though that it's never really like that. Sometimes it simply won't work and that's OK.

Everyone has ups and downs in life and it's hard to be in a situation where you can't be your authentic self around a significant other because things are in an awkward state.

*Hugs* Things will get better soon.
Thanks. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.
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