3 year old hyper focusing on things

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carterscutie85
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My son is 3.5 now and he gets in these moods where he hyper focuses on things.

For example. He wanted to hit my TV with a toy. I told him no. For the next 2 hours he kept climbing up trying to hit the TV. I removed him every time but he just kept going back to it. Nothing at all could distract him. I tried everything.

If I take him outside he says "I'm going to run into the street!" and tries to but obviously I have a death grip on him.

He hyper focuses on other things too. Usually it's something he can't have. I had to hide the chocolate milk mix because all day long he would run into the kitchen and open the cabinet it was in demanding chocolate milk. This would last an hour at a time 6-7 times a day. Like I said nothing could distract him. Even telling him he could have chocolate milk later didn't help. He would prefer to have 6-7 cups a day.

He tries to climb my fridge 500 times a day to get to the scissors up there. I had to buy a baby lock for the fridge because another thing he obsesses on is getting random things from the fridge to carry around. And once he decides what he wants, that's it, there is no giving him things he can have instead. He usually goes for the eggs but obviously he can't just walk around with the eggs, he would break them everywhere and make a gigantic mess.

Like I said it's always things he can't have but nothing at all distracts him when he is focused on what he wants and it lasts 1-2 hours before he gives up.

I feel like he must have some sense of danger because when I take him to the park sometimes on the equipment there are drops. Like there is a pole there but since he hasn't figured out the pole yet I can see that he wants to jump but chooses not to. So to me that seems like he knows it's not safe. So the running into the street thing, I don't necessarily think it's because he has no sense of danger. I think it's another thing he's hyper focused on.

His vocabulary is excellent, he's met all other milestones, but sometimes I think he doesn't understand what I say. He acknowledges me but then does whatever he wasn't supposed to do anyways.

His doctor thinks it could be ADD/ADHD or OCD. Which my DH was diagnosed with ADHD and OCD. My stepdaughter was also diagnosed with ADHD.

My husband's aunt raised him and she says our son is exactly like DH was. And when she sent him to school DH was so off the hook bad that the school literally said he had to medicated for his ADHD or he couldn't come back.

Next month I can call the school system and have him evaluated and see if he qualifies for special needs preschool.

I have an assessment scheduled on the 12th with a doctor who can diagnose ADD/ADHD to see if we can get some answers. Some people have suggested autism, but no one here diagnoses kids under 5 anymore.

As of right now if I were to drop him off in a school setting and they were doing one activity if that's not what he wanted to do then there would be no convincing him to do it. For example if he didn't want to do storytime he would run to whatever he wanted to do and that would last 1-2 hours. Which obviously he can't be doing that in school unless it was a special needs program where they could work with him.

I've never seen a kid so downright determined to get what they were told they couldn't have. Explaining why he can't have it/do whatever doesn't work. Like I said he acknowledges me but goes right back to it so I don't think he quite understands.

The only time he sits still is for Blippi. Other than that he is running around literally trying to swing from my chandeliers. Like literally he tried to swing from one. He has endless energy so even taking him outside to play, the park, etc he still has tons of energy which he focuses on doing/getting into things he can't have. It's like he isn't happy unless he is destroying or trying to destroy everything in sight.

When I took him to his regular doctor she saw his behavior and said I should stop giving him sugar. I was like Ma'am this is how he is 100% of the time with or without sugar. At that point he hadn't even had any sugar besides what was in his waffles that morning which he eats without butter or syrup so there was no extra sugar there

Oh and forget going out to eat. He literally will not sit still. Period. He wants to run around. Last time I put him in a high chair he broke the strap trying to get out. Either that or he screams that he is trapped the entire time.
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Have him evaluated not by his pcp
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It could be the age. Could be AD or ADHD.

I'm no medical expert but a big supporter of ruling things out. Any chance he's on a new, routine medication for something unrelated and it could be an adverse reaction? What about a child's multivitamin that he's having a reaction to?
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carterscutie85
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AZOldCoot wrote: Fri Jul 01, 2022 2:22 pm It could be the age. Could be AD or ADHD.

I'm no medical expert but a big supporter of ruling things out. Any chance he's on a new, routine medication for something unrelated and it could be an adverse reaction? What about a child's multivitamin that he's having a reaction to?
He doesn't take anything. I tried to give him a multivitamin before but he doesn't like anything gummy and wouldn't take the other kinds. Even crushed up in his food he could taste them and not eat.
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Quorra2.0
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What forms of discipline are you using when he continues?
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carterscutie85
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Quorra2.0 wrote: Fri Jul 01, 2022 2:50 pm What forms of discipline are you using when he continues?
His doctor told me to redirect which sometimes works but not when he's hyper focused on things. There is zero way he'd ever sit in a time out or anything like that.
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Oh come on. He's a difficult kid. Some just are. Lots of kids are holy terrors. It won't last forever. You'll get through it. Why the constant need to label these days?
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Anonymous 1 wrote: Fri Jul 01, 2022 3:08 pm Oh come on. He's a difficult kid. Some just are. Lots of kids are holy terrors. It won't last forever. You'll get through it. Why the constant need to label these days?
Because this is more than just a difficult child and sometimes it's okay to label people
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Anonymous 1 wrote: Fri Jul 01, 2022 3:08 pm Oh come on. He's a difficult kid. Some just are. Lots of kids are holy terrors. It won't last forever. You'll get through it. Why the constant need to label these days?
He is getting ready to go to preschool, and like I said he cannot be running around like a crazy person when it's time for whatever activity. Which is exactly what he would do. He's got to learn how to act in school. I know he is 3, and 3 year olds are wild, but a teacher cannot be expected to spend 1-2 hours redirecting him when he's decided he'd rather not participate in whatever the class is doing.
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Honestly getting him tested for ADHD and autism is your best bet. My oldest was almost just like that. It was like that child was on speed sometimes. He was diagnosed with autism and ADHD a little over 2 years ago. He’s almost 13 now. Hyper focusing can be a symptom of both.
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