I failed a student and now I think I will lose my best friend

[Anon]

My best friend had a daughter in one of my classes. It was kind of awkward because my friend kept asking me to allow things to "slide" or give her daughter an advantage because of the friendship.

Of course I would never do that. My job is important and it isnt doing the student any favors to let her slide through and not learn anything.

About two months ago she started doing really poorly in class. I brought it up in parent teacher conferences and my best friend didnt take it seriously. Last month I sat them down again saying if things do not change failing the class is probably what was going to happen. Well the DD didnt make any changes and sure enough she failed the class.

Grades were posted and within minutes I got an angry phone call from my best friend saying how could I let this happen and now DD has to retake the class either in summer school or not graduate on time. I told her I was sorry she felt that way but her DD needed to do the work required and do well on the test to pass the class just like anyone else.

She told me if I dont find a way to change the grade I will lose her as a friend forever. This has really opened my eyes. For one I didnt realize how immature she is. I didnt realize how lazy of a parent she is and I dont really want to be friends with someone who would give me an ultimatum like that. No one is worth risking my job over. It just sucks because we have been friends for over 20 years. I never thought things would go like this.

[AllofFive19]

Sometimes you never see the true person until something like this happens.

[Jessi19]

Wow while that sucks sounds like you’re better off without her

[Spookly]

She was taking advantage of you and wasn't really being your friend. She was being an asshat and a lazy ass mom. Don't feel bad for that. She's robbing her daughter of responsibility. Her daughter is gonna get a big smack to the F***ing face with reality once she realizes mommy can't save her from doing real work in the big world.
Sorry lovey~

[StPauliGirl]

She was taking advantage of you and wasn't really being your friend. She was being an asshat and a lazy ass mom. Don't feel bad for that. She's robbing her daughter of responsibility. Her daughter is gonna get a big smack to the F***ing face with reality once she realizes mommy can't save her from doing real work in the big world.
Sorry lovey~

Exactly this.

[CMrefugee]

She's clearly taking advantage of your relationship. It's time to rethink that friendship. How shitty.

[AsteroidStar]

She will get a huge wake up call when the kid fails summer school too. Can't really blame you for that one.(Unless you are teaching the summer school class?) Sorry this happened. Sounds like you did everything you could to wake her and her daughter both up.

[Rebeccaraev2]

Tough shit. Friendship doesn’t mean taking advantage of others. She’s a cuntwaffle. You did the right thing.

[RedBottoms]

I see this a lot actually. At my kid's old elementary school a lot of the parents had their kids in the classes of their friends. And magically their kids somehow won all the character awards and got picked for other things like spelling bee and other little things even though their kids were not the smartest................um its because their parents are BFFs or church friends or neighbors etc with the teacher. It was so transparent.

If my kids won something it was because they actually earned it because I was not friends with anyone.

I don't go to church. I was not raised in this town. I am not that type.

[RedBottoms]

ps I think the Principals should be on duty to disallow this. If I were a principal I would tell my teachers if you are friends outside school with a parent and their kid is coming to this school-you need to disclose that so I can make sure that kid does not end up in your class. NO BFFs kids in your classes as that is a conflict of interest.