S/O I have 50/50 custody and no one is the primary parent

[Lotus]

primarily with people I know, when you hear someone say I have 60%-40% what it typically means is that a minor is residing at one custodial parents resident longer during the month etc than the other parents residence so the courts in many cases will adjust support to reflect that. its not necesailly something that the couple decides and of course as we see played out on here its use as a power move.

[Poietes]

When it came to the kids I had final say because I was their primary caregiver, and he got the final say in business dealings because he was the one that actually dealt with them.


One person is going to make the final decision whether this is planned out or not.

I find that sad. Sure there are times dh will defer to me or I'll defer to him if something means more to one than the other but for the most part we talk things out and come to a compromise especially if we both feel strongly. No one's opinion means more than the others.

Ok. I kind of find that sad. I Didn’t want a life of compromising when it came to what was best for my children.

I knew what was best for them because I was the one taking care of them. I can’t compromise on some things.

My husband also knew how capable and logical I was so he felt ok about focusing on his work and making his businesses extremely successful.

But are you two so different that you really would spend all of the time compromising? I mean, for the most part I take care of the kids and make plenty of every day decisions without consulting him And even some more important medical ones like which doctors to use. But there are some things we may disagree on, such as if he punishes one of them for something and I may not agree with it that I absolutely not interject and take away that power from him. For the most part we have no need to compromise simply because one or the other doesn’t care as much or we agree.

[Frau Holle]

I find that sad. Sure there are times dh will defer to me or I'll defer to him if something means more to one than the other but for the most part we talk things out and come to a compromise especially if we both feel strongly. No one's opinion means more than the others.

Ok. I kind of find that sad. I Didn’t want a life of compromising when it came to what was best for my children.

I knew what was best for them because I was the one taking care of them. I can’t compromise on some things.

My husband also knew how capable and logical I was so he felt ok about focusing on his work and making his businesses extremely successful.

But are you two so different that you really would spend all of the time compromising? I mean, for the most part I take care of the kids and make plenty of every day decisions without consulting him And even some more important medical ones like which doctors to use. But there are some things we may disagree on, such as if he punishes one of them for something and I may not agree with it that I absolutely not interject and take away that power from him. For the most part we have no need to compromise simply because one or the other doesn’t care as much or we agree.

There wasn’t anything at all we disagreed on because I made the decisions.

But that would be an extreme no on whether or not the medical care they received would be what I knew to be the best or a compromise. They would get what I knew to be best.

I just would never allow someone else to punish my children in a way I disagreed with. Whether that person was my husband or not. I’d never have allowed it.