Joint finances?

Rebeccaraev2
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We do separate with a joint savings.
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SisterSomeone
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Pretty much, yeah. I don't get the multiple question marks. It's really not complicated at all. Regular bills, we split them between us so that we both break about even, and big expenses, we literally each pay half. Usually, the way we logistically do it is one of us pays the full tag out of their accounts, and then we balance it out between ourselves privately. We tried having throwaway joint account for a while that we were supposed to use for things like home expenses and family vacations and stuff, but frankly we just found it annoying and more of a hassle than we cared for, so we went back to this.
Anonymous 4 wrote: Sat Aug 01, 2020 5:25 pm Help me understand how it works when couples have separate finances. What happens when you need a new roof? You each pay half???
SisterSomeone wrote: Sat Aug 01, 2020 4:34 pm To each their own. If joint finances work for someone I'm not going to tell them not to do it, but it's not for me, personally. I would never, ever have or even consider joint finances.
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bluebunnybabe
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Traci_Momof2 wrote: Fri Jul 31, 2020 7:19 pm
Valentina327 wrote: Fri Jul 31, 2020 6:06 pm I think what works the best is each having an account for their own spending and then a third joint account where you both put in for bills.

I tried that combination thing with my ex. One person swipes their debit card then doesn't tell the other one, then you go to write out a check for the electric bill and the cash is gone. It makes for some annoyed phone calls! LOL
That's why we use a credit card for daily expenses. If one person swipes the credit card for, say gas, the money is still in the checking account to pay the electric bill. Then the credit card bill is paid off when the statement comes. If the credit card bill comes higher than typical then we just say "credit card was high this month, we both need to tighten up on our daily spending". But money never actually comes out of the checking account until one of us (these days me) sits down to pay all the bills.

Plus the concept of swiping a debit card is cringy to me. We've had our credit card number stolen from gas pumps or what not multiple times over the years. The credit card company handles it very well and we've never had to pay money, even temporarily, for charges that aren't ours. I can't even imagine having my debit card to my bank accounts stolen in that way. {{shudder}}
I thought I was the only one who doesn’t have a debit card for just that reason. People always look at me like I’m crazy when I say I don’t have one. 😂
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I beg to differ. I think it could get real complicated real quick. What happens when one of the two doesn't HAVE half? Or what happens if one becomes ill and doesn't have the earning potential to even kick in half? I just think that when you get married, his money is your money. Your money is his money. And there's none of that "halfsy stuff." lol
SisterSomeone wrote: Wed Aug 05, 2020 9:51 pm Pretty much, yeah. I don't get the multiple question marks. It's really not complicated at all. Regular bills, we split them between us so that we both break about even, and big expenses, we literally each pay half. Usually, the way we logistically do it is one of us pays the full tag out of their accounts, and then we balance it out between ourselves privately. We tried having throwaway joint account for a while that we were supposed to use for things like home expenses and family vacations and stuff, but frankly we just found it annoying and more of a hassle than we cared for, so we went back to this.
Anonymous 4 wrote: Sat Aug 01, 2020 5:25 pm Help me understand how it works when couples have separate finances. What happens when you need a new roof? You each pay half???
SisterSomeone wrote: Sat Aug 01, 2020 4:34 pm To each their own. If joint finances work for someone I'm not going to tell them not to do it, but it's not for me, personally. I would never, ever have or even consider joint finances.
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bluebunnybabe
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Anonymous 4 wrote: Wed Aug 05, 2020 10:51 pm I beg to differ. I think it could get real complicated real quick. What happens when one of the two doesn't HAVE half? Or what happens if one becomes ill and doesn't have the earning potential to even kick in half? I just think that when you get married, his money is your money. Your money is his money. And there's none of that "halfsy stuff." lol
SisterSomeone wrote: Wed Aug 05, 2020 9:51 pm Pretty much, yeah. I don't get the multiple question marks. It's really not complicated at all. Regular bills, we split them between us so that we both break about even, and big expenses, we literally each pay half. Usually, the way we logistically do it is one of us pays the full tag out of their accounts, and then we balance it out between ourselves privately. We tried having throwaway joint account for a while that we were supposed to use for things like home expenses and family vacations and stuff, but frankly we just found it annoying and more of a hassle than we cared for, so we went back to this.
Anonymous 4 wrote: Sat Aug 01, 2020 5:25 pm Help me understand how it works when couples have separate finances. What happens when you need a new roof? You each pay half???

I have some friends who used to keep their money separate like that, and it caused issues when one got sick and couldn’t pay their half a few years back.
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Anonymous 4 wrote: Wed Aug 05, 2020 10:51 pm I beg to differ. I think it could get real complicated real quick. What happens when one of the two doesn't HAVE half? Or what happens if one becomes ill and doesn't have the earning potential to even kick in half? I just think that when you get married, his money is your money. Your money is his money. And there's none of that "halfsy stuff." lol
SisterSomeone wrote: Wed Aug 05, 2020 9:51 pm Pretty much, yeah. I don't get the multiple question marks. It's really not complicated at all. Regular bills, we split them between us so that we both break about even, and big expenses, we literally each pay half. Usually, the way we logistically do it is one of us pays the full tag out of their accounts, and then we balance it out between ourselves privately. We tried having throwaway joint account for a while that we were supposed to use for things like home expenses and family vacations and stuff, but frankly we just found it annoying and more of a hassle than we cared for, so we went back to this.
Anonymous 4 wrote: Sat Aug 01, 2020 5:25 pm Help me understand how it works when couples have separate finances. What happens when you need a new roof? You each pay half???

DH and I have kept our finances separate for 27 years and it has never been "complicated". It's an agreement, not a contract, so we are able to adjust as one or the other's income fluctuates.
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I can see how it could. :?
bluebunnybabe wrote: Thu Aug 06, 2020 2:25 pm
Anonymous 4 wrote: Wed Aug 05, 2020 10:51 pm I beg to differ. I think it could get real complicated real quick. What happens when one of the two doesn't HAVE half? Or what happens if one becomes ill and doesn't have the earning potential to even kick in half? I just think that when you get married, his money is your money. Your money is his money. And there's none of that "halfsy stuff." lol
SisterSomeone wrote: Wed Aug 05, 2020 9:51 pm Pretty much, yeah. I don't get the multiple question marks. It's really not complicated at all. Regular bills, we split them between us so that we both break about even, and big expenses, we literally each pay half. Usually, the way we logistically do it is one of us pays the full tag out of their accounts, and then we balance it out between ourselves privately. We tried having throwaway joint account for a while that we were supposed to use for things like home expenses and family vacations and stuff, but frankly we just found it annoying and more of a hassle than we cared for, so we went back to this.

I have some friends who used to keep their money separate like that, and it caused issues when one got sick and couldn’t pay their half a few years back.
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I could see that it could work. But I could also see it working OK...until it doesn't. But I'm glad that it has worked for you and your spouse for all these years.
Anonymous 8 wrote: Thu Aug 06, 2020 2:52 pm
Anonymous 4 wrote: Wed Aug 05, 2020 10:51 pm I beg to differ. I think it could get real complicated real quick. What happens when one of the two doesn't HAVE half? Or what happens if one becomes ill and doesn't have the earning potential to even kick in half? I just think that when you get married, his money is your money. Your money is his money. And there's none of that "halfsy stuff." lol
SisterSomeone wrote: Wed Aug 05, 2020 9:51 pm Pretty much, yeah. I don't get the multiple question marks. It's really not complicated at all. Regular bills, we split them between us so that we both break about even, and big expenses, we literally each pay half. Usually, the way we logistically do it is one of us pays the full tag out of their accounts, and then we balance it out between ourselves privately. We tried having throwaway joint account for a while that we were supposed to use for things like home expenses and family vacations and stuff, but frankly we just found it annoying and more of a hassle than we cared for, so we went back to this.

DH and I have kept our finances separate for 27 years and it has never been "complicated". It's an agreement, not a contract, so we are able to adjust as one or the other's income fluctuates.
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That's your opinion. Mine is pretty much diametrically different, lol. I absolutely do not believe in "our money". That doesn't exist. His money is not my money, and my money is certainly not his money. I do not want and would never spend anything I didn't earn, and I prefer to be in full and exclusive control of what I did earn. Helps me sleep at night, and certainly helps us never fight about money. We've been married for 6 years and while we have fought about things, money was not one of them.

I don't see what's there to get complicated at all. It's not a contract signed in blood, lol. And it is not arbitrary, either. It's a 50/50 split is because we make roughly the same salary at this time, and have been since we got married. If and when one or both of our incomes cchanged, in either direction, so would the split.
Anonymous 4 wrote: Wed Aug 05, 2020 10:51 pm I beg to differ. I think it could get real complicated real quick. What happens when one of the two doesn't HAVE half? Or what happens if one becomes ill and doesn't have the earning potential to even kick in half? I just think that when you get married, his money is your money. Your money is his money. And there's none of that "halfsy stuff." lol
SisterSomeone wrote: Wed Aug 05, 2020 9:51 pm Pretty much, yeah. I don't get the multiple question marks. It's really not complicated at all. Regular bills, we split them between us so that we both break about even, and big expenses, we literally each pay half. Usually, the way we logistically do it is one of us pays the full tag out of their accounts, and then we balance it out between ourselves privately. We tried having throwaway joint account for a while that we were supposed to use for things like home expenses and family vacations and stuff, but frankly we just found it annoying and more of a hassle than we cared for, so we went back to this.
Anonymous 4 wrote: Sat Aug 01, 2020 5:25 pm Help me understand how it works when couples have separate finances. What happens when you need a new roof? You each pay half???

CherryTreez
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He works and I stay home with the kids. I wouldn't have any money if it wasn't joint. I did work while he went to college and I paid for most of the bills then.
He jokes that he makes it and I spend it.
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