Paying BM child support is not the priority right now

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DH stopped working a few months ago. I am luckily still working but we now have 1/4th of the income we did before. DH is supposed to be paying $1000 a month to BM in child support. He hasn't been able to while not working and now that he is getting a lot less in unemployment. He asked if I would pay it and I told him no, that would make us broke and unable to pay other bills.

BM isn't struggling and doesn't need the money. The kids are still with us every other week so our costs aren't going down at all. Paying the child support just isn't a priority right now. Keeping our bills paid so we don't have our electricity turned off or our transportation taken away is more important. Having food on the table is more important.

I'm not saying that DH is just not ever going to pay it again. He will still owe all that money and need to pay it but it just isn't going to happen right now. BM is mad that he missed his first payment ever. She said she was going to talk to her lawyer about it which is her right. I wish she could be more understanding. My ex doesn't pay child support but if he did I would understand if he couldn't due to losing his job during a pandemic.

The whole thing sucks. I can't wait until DH gets a job again.
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Gorilla_Mama
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He should go to court and see if he can get it lowered. When you say stopped working do you mean he was laid off or did he quit?
Anonymous 1

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Gorilla_Mama wrote: Tue Jul 28, 2020 5:06 pm He should go to court and see if he can get it lowered. When you say stopped working do you mean he was laid off or did he quit?
His hours were cut down to almost nothing and then again to nothing with no end date. I'm not sure if the company will ever really reopen again.
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Did he actually talk to the bm about all this and ask if she'd take a lesser amount? I mean if I were him I wouldn't ignore it. I'd call the courts or the child support office to get it lowered before she decides garnishing his unemployment is the answer. Whether she needs the money or not isn't the issue and you don't know that. Covering his ass is the issue.
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Pjmm wrote: Tue Jul 28, 2020 5:23 pm Did he actually talk to the bm about all this and ask if she'd take a lesser amount? I mean if I were him I wouldn't ignore it. I'd call the courts or the child support office to get it lowered before she decides garnishing his unemployment is the answer.
Yes he has talked to her. She says child support is a bill just as important as the rest. They aren't even holding court right now except in emergency cases. They don't go through the child support agency or anything it would have to be a change made to the actual court order.
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Anonymous 1 wrote: Tue Jul 28, 2020 5:25 pm
Pjmm wrote: Tue Jul 28, 2020 5:23 pm Did he actually talk to the bm about all this and ask if she'd take a lesser amount? I mean if I were him I wouldn't ignore it. I'd call the courts or the child support office to get it lowered before she decides garnishing his unemployment is the answer.
Yes he has talked to her. She says child support is a bill just as important as the rest. They aren't even holding court right now except in emergency cases. They don't go through the child support agency or anything it would have to be a change made to the actual court order.
Well I'd at least make good faith attempts to pay something and document whatever he does. I'm not sure what our courts are doing. It just might look better if he can say later out of my unemployment this is what I gave. Bm should do the right thing and cut him a break but who knows? Maybe she'll end up paying him if she's working and he's not.
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Here court rulings on child support are made retroactive to the date of filing. Even if courts aren't opened right now I'd see if thats the case where you are and if you can at least file something to be heard whenever they open back up.
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I would suggest he talk to his lawyer.
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Sounds like he should have been saving that extra $600 a week. Sucks to be him.
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He should go to court and get the child support lowered. Especially since his ex isn't being realistic.
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