7 y/o birthday help

Anonymous 1

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Anonymous 2 wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 9:00 pm
Anonymous 1 wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 8:55 pm
Anonymous 2 wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 8:07 pm Maybe money for her birthday? My kids aren't bratty like that so I'm not much help.
We don't have in store shopping right now, so it'd have to be online. And then it might cause a tantrum because I won't let her buy what she wants, for space reasons. Then I'd feel like I'd have to take her money away as punishment. So I want to avoid all that. My mom bought her clothes, to avoid buying her a toy she might not like. Those are the only other gifts she'll get.
Well you're just going to have to make a decision because none of us can fix your space or brattiness for you. Maybe making her some space of her own somehow? Because it's not fair to her having no toys inside, no personal space, nothing. Poor kid must be miserable.
I know, I know. This is our third "quarantine" birthday, and I should just be grateful the other two were so easy instead of stressing about this one.

Thank you so much for the suggestion. I'm sure I was frustrating, but you were really helpful. We have a fairly big outdoor space, and she considers it her space. But the hoa has been very strict with us. I decided to talk to her about it, and she said there's episodes of her show where the dolls have this outdoor dollhouse (she didn't know the name of it- google lens found it for me):

https://www.walmart.com/ip/Tree-Blocks- ... lerId=1148

I'll check and see if that would be allowed. Very exciting for her if it is, so fingers crossed!
Anonymous 1

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Anonymous 4 wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 10:49 pm
Anonymous 1 wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 8:55 pm
Anonymous 2 wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 8:07 pm Maybe money for her birthday? My kids aren't bratty like that so I'm not much help.
We don't have in store shopping right now, so it'd have to be online. And then it might cause a tantrum because I won't let her buy what she wants, for space reasons. Then I'd feel like I'd have to take her money away as punishment. So I want to avoid all that. My mom bought her clothes, to avoid buying her a toy she might not like. Those are the only other gifts she'll get.
What the hell county in CA is that? I know ours got rid of the in-restaurant eating again, but we've always had the in-store shopping, even during the worst of it.
Wow, really? There are 19 counties Newsom recommend a shut down for indoor businesses. You're still allowed indoor shopping for stores that sell essential items. Like Safeway, Home Depot, and Target. That's never stopped. And we started curbside pick up for non-food stores about three weeks ago, so it was just a return to that.
Anonymous 1

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LiveWhatULove wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 10:42 pm That is really tough!

How about:
LOL dolls to fit in the calico critter house? OR
A bunch of fun candy that she can make a sweet candy land with, almost like a non-Christmas candy house? -- so she can design, then play but eventually everything gets eaten or thrown away?

And then a stand to hold the I-phone, so she can record her movie scenes with her sets?

Also play-mobil has some smaller dollhouse like sets, that would be fun to record with, and don't take a lot of space.

And last, I banned YouTube for my DD about 9 months ago. Even though she only watched kids & family friendly things (including the video you showed & things like HoneyHeartC), it was negatively influencing behavior & material expectations.I am very happy we made the decision, as I think it has greatly improved her "brattiness".
Those were really great ideas! Thank you so much.

Good for you for banning YouTube! Youtube was something she saw when she spent time with my mil- this show in particular. When shelter in place started, they all got a lot more screen time. We couldn't get books from the library, playgrounds were closed, and we thought it was only going to be for a few weeks.

The kids were all sharing one device because I was an idiot and thought I should let the schools give devices to needier families. She broke our only tablet (dropped it in water and then hid it so that we couldn't get it in rice soon enough to possibly help it). Not the way I'd like it to be solved, but I will not be buying the "pike tablit" she wrote on her list. I guess the kids could technically access Youtube still. It's just a lot harder because it requires someone to help them, and DH has to be done with his work laptop for the day.
Anonymous 1

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Pjmm wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 10:37 pm
Anonymous 1 wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 8:03 pm
pinkbutterfly66 wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 7:58 pm If she's picky and bratty it's because you don't tell her no and follow through. Tell her there's no room and it's not gonna happen. She'll live. If you don't get a handle on this 7 y/o brat now, she's gonna be an adult size brat at 12. Put a cork in it now and put your foot down. And tell her that if she wants to do what she wants then she'd better start looking for another set of parents who are pushovers because it ain't gonna happen otherwise. For Bob's sake woman, shut that shit down NOW.
I actually cannot remember what year it was when she was last told yes. She gets told no plenty, and it's always followed through on because there's no other choice. She doesn't have a bedroom and shares the combination living room/dining room area with the rest of our beds. She's been told there's no room plenty of times. DH then gets all depressed and says self-hating things because he feels like a failure.
Yeah well your dh needs relax and come up with solutions instead of being depressed. Some live in their cars. I'd tell her there's no room. Yes it sucks but it is what it is. Now let's figure out what can be done.
That's a whole other thing. He's gotten on antidepressants, but living with him has been very different for these months. I'm assuming that there's a lot of people who are having a harder time.
Anonymous 1

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LuckyEightWow wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 10:44 pm We would celebrate her birthday: cake, ice cream and a song, but a child who acts like that would not get any gifts.

I raised 8 in a small house so I get the limited space issue, if she won’t be happy with what you can do, don’t bother.
It's a one bedroom apartment during a pandemic where we only got the ability to kick a ball in a field on June 18th. Playgrounds are still closed. You can't go in the library. But fields are open again. That's been life-changing. I've been making the kids walk, but my oldest son called them the walks to nowhere until fields reopened.

I was only going to get her one gift for her birthday because of her behavior, but I totally understand where you are coming from because I don't know if that is too much of a reward. My mom always gives gifts and this time got clothes for her instead. My mom doesn't want grandma associated with disappointment if the gift is not just right.
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Anonymous 3 wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 8:15 pm She’s trapped with 5 other people in 728 sq ft - of course she is miserable! I would suggest an outing somewhere fun rather than a toy.
Right? I'm trapped in a 1900 sqft house with 5 other people and I feel cramped some day. Can't imagine a 728 sqft place 😩
And yes, I would also do an outing.
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Yeah, no. She would be lucky if she got anything for her birthday if she's acting like that. She needs to learn to be respectful. And until then, she would be getting socks and underwear for her birthday, and Christmas.

Also, I would not be trying to get her a doll house that we didn't have room for, just so she could do something like this... That's just silly. If she's not going to be happy either way, then why even try?
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Anonymous 1 wrote: Thu Jul 09, 2020 8:42 am
LiveWhatULove wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 10:42 pm That is really tough!

How about:
LOL dolls to fit in the calico critter house? OR
A bunch of fun candy that she can make a sweet candy land with, almost like a non-Christmas candy house? -- so she can design, then play but eventually everything gets eaten or thrown away?

And then a stand to hold the I-phone, so she can record her movie scenes with her sets?

Also play-mobil has some smaller dollhouse like sets, that would be fun to record with, and don't take a lot of space.

And last, I banned YouTube for my DD about 9 months ago. Even though she only watched kids & family friendly things (including the video you showed & things like HoneyHeartC), it was negatively influencing behavior & material expectations.I am very happy we made the decision, as I think it has greatly improved her "brattiness".
Those were really great ideas! Thank you so much.

Good for you for banning YouTube! Youtube was something she saw when she spent time with my mil- this show in particular. When shelter in place started, they all got a lot more screen time. We couldn't get books from the library, playgrounds were closed, and we thought it was only going to be for a few weeks.

The kids were all sharing one device because I was an idiot and thought I should let the schools give devices to needier families. She broke our only tablet (dropped it in water and then hid it so that we couldn't get it in rice soon enough to possibly help it). Not the way I'd like it to be solved, but I will not be buying the "pike tablit" she wrote on her list. I guess the kids could technically access Youtube still. It's just a lot harder because it requires someone to help them, and DH has to be done with his work laptop for the day.
Oh, now don't get me confused with a good mom, lol, my kids get way too much screen time, but DD only gets movies & cartoons & games. The YouTube was just messing with her too much!
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agander2017 wrote: Thu Jul 09, 2020 9:19 am Yeah, no. She would be lucky if she got anything for her birthday if she's acting like that. She needs to learn to be respectful. And until then, she would be getting socks and underwear for her birthday, and Christmas.

Also, I would not be trying to get her a doll house that we didn't have room for, just so she could do something like this... That's just silly. If she's not going to be happy either way, then why even try?
I would agree except she's in an apartment probably meant for two but five people are there. I would say no to the dollhouse but cut her some slack. She can't even go anywhere. I'd want to kill someone too if i were her. In fact I know- and it's wrong- that I'd tell dh please pull it together. So I can't blame this kid for being whiny.
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Anonymous 1 wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 8:28 pm
Lotus wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 8:17 pm LOL, well I can see why she likes the house.
I had to google the calico one, it's adorable, but you know your child the best.
I also think it's very impressive that you've managed to make your space work for all of you.
Happy birthday to your child.
It definitely doesn't work with all the closures. My neighbors must hate us, and we have no downstairs neighbors. It's just that loud. We've already gotten one call from our HOA and a letter. It's probably harder on someone like her, who wants to invite an entire day camp of kids to a trampoline place for her birthday.

I have a hunch you will all benefit in a positive way from this experience.
LOL, kids can be SO loud there is no doubt.
I like the sound of kids stomping around, laughing, and screaming at each other. Its what their bodies are designed to do.
I have another hunch, I bet your neighbors like you just fine.
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