First date S*x. Is he an ass?

Anonymous 1

Unread post

I had this guy chasing after me for two months. He was constantly hitting me up and wanting to talk. He would send heartfelt messages pouring his heart out. Well, I finally agreed to go out on a date with him. He seemed nice enough and we got along really well together but then he ended up taking me back to his house and that lead to S*x. He put the moves on me very quickly. The whole time I kept feeling like this was wrong and I was making a mistake but then I felt such a connection with him to the point where I pretty much convinced myself that I was making the right choice. The very next day I noticed a drop in conversation. I would ask him how he was doing and he would say "good". I ended up sending him a message that was just a little" pissy". I told him that he got what he wanted and now I noticed that he didn't seem to want to talk to me as much. I basically told him that I felt dirty. Well, he went off on me how his work was keeping him extra busy and how he didn't have as much time to talk. Anyway, we ended up making up and since then he's been communicating via Messenger but we haven't hung out in almost two weeks. What does this look like to you? He keeps hearting my posts and stories on Facebook so this just confuses me that much more.
Opinions?
User avatar
mojogirl
Donated
Donated
Regent
Regent
Posts: 2766
Joined: Sat Sep 15, 2018 3:20 pm

Unread post

Anonymous 1 wrote:
Sat May 30, 2020 12:55 pm
I had this guy chasing after me for two months. He was constantly hitting me up and wanting to talk. He would send heartfelt messages pouring his heart out. Well, I finally agreed to go out on a date with him. He seemed nice enough and we got along really well together but then he ended up taking me back to his house and that lead to S*x. He put the moves on me very quickly. The whole time I kept feeling like this was wrong and I was making a mistake but then I felt such a connection with him to the point where I pretty much convinced myself that I was making the right choice. The very next day I noticed a drop in conversation. I would ask him how he was doing and he would say "good". I ended up sending him a message that was just a little" pissy". I told him that he got what he wanted and now I noticed that he didn't seem to want to talk to me as much. I basically told him that I felt dirty. Well, he went off on me how his work was keeping him extra busy and how he didn't have as much time to talk. Anyway, we ended up making up and since then he's been communicating via Messenger but we haven't hung out in almost two weeks. What does this look like to you? He keeps hearting my posts and stories on Facebook so this just confuses me that much more.
Opinions?
How many hours was it before you got pissy?
Anonymous 1

Unread post

mojogirl wrote:
Sat May 30, 2020 1:13 pm
Anonymous 1 wrote:
Sat May 30, 2020 12:55 pm
I had this guy chasing after me for two months. He was constantly hitting me up and wanting to talk. He would send heartfelt messages pouring his heart out. Well, I finally agreed to go out on a date with him. He seemed nice enough and we got along really well together but then he ended up taking me back to his house and that lead to S*x. He put the moves on me very quickly. The whole time I kept feeling like this was wrong and I was making a mistake but then I felt such a connection with him to the point where I pretty much convinced myself that I was making the right choice. The very next day I noticed a drop in conversation. I would ask him how he was doing and he would say "good". I ended up sending him a message that was just a little" pissy". I told him that he got what he wanted and now I noticed that he didn't seem to want to talk to me as much. I basically told him that I felt dirty. Well, he went off on me how his work was keeping him extra busy and how he didn't have as much time to talk. Anyway, we ended up making up and since then he's been communicating via Messenger but we haven't hung out in almost two weeks. What does this look like to you? He keeps hearting my posts and stories on Facebook so this just confuses me that much more.
Opinions?
How many hours was it before you got pissy?
Two days.
User avatar
LiveWhatULove
Donated
Donated
Queen Mother
Queen Mother
Posts: 9764
Joined: Mon May 21, 2018 7:55 am

Unread post

Am not sure if he’s an intentional ass, or and unintentional ass, but I still think anyone, that pursues you hot and heavy, with suggestions of feelings & relationship potential, then, has S*x with you, then changes his behavior, is an inconsiderate ass.

And when you shared your feelings, instead of saying “wow, I am sorry, that is how you feel, but that’s not my intent”...he loses his temper too, makes more excuses. He would not fall into the long-term partner relationship material to me,

I am sorry.
LindaSmith
Countess
Countess
Posts: 303
Joined: Sun Mar 08, 2020 6:10 pm

Unread post

You are an adult I assume. You made the choice to have S*x with him. He then made the choice to limit his communications with you. Just because you have S*x with someone on the first date isn't a guarantee of a relationship. It doesn't make him an ass. Its a lesson to you to refine your dating choices. You should also get checked for any stds.
User avatar
carterscutie85
Queen Mother
Queen Mother
Posts: 9412
Joined: Mon May 21, 2018 10:19 am

Unread post

If he wanted to date you he would put in the effort. Period. I would straight tell him that unless he makes his intentions clear I would be moving on. It sounds like he wants to keep you on the hook for when he gets bored or it doesn't work out with other women.
Image
Anonymous 2

Unread post

He wanted a piece of ass, he got it, now he's done..move on lesson learned.
CandTmom
Regent
Regent
Posts: 2494
Joined: Mon Jun 04, 2018 5:12 pm

Unread post

I would just come right out and ask him. Maybe he just feels awkward maybe he just wanted S*x. Ask him
User avatar
CotterpinDoozer
Donated
Donated
Regent
Regent
Posts: 2432
Joined: Mon May 21, 2018 11:57 am

Unread post

I’m sorry, but it sounds like he might be the type of guy who’s more interested in the chase and getting what he wants than any kind of relationship.
Image
Anonymous 3

Unread post

Before you had S*x with him, did you tell him anything like, "I'm not into casual S*x. If I sleep with someone, it's because I want to be in a committed relationship with that person"? If you weren't comfortable having S*x with him, you should have just told him, "No. I'm not ready yet." I don't think you should be mad at him if you didn't even make your wants & thoughts on the matter known to him.
Post Reply Previous topicNext topic