I'm not making my kids pretend them believe in Santa

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madfoodie
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I don't do Santa, so what I'd do is:
1) your kids open some gifts after her kids go to bed, so they don't see
2) your kids wil still, have some to open Christmas morning and her kids won't wonder why cousin Johnny was so bad he got nothing.
i want candy!
Anonymous 6

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My parents did the Santa thing and it was not a huge ordeal. Some of the presents were marked from Santa and that was it. You’re looking way too much into it.
Anonymous 7

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Anonymous 1 wrote: Thu Nov 21, 2019 9:46 am This year we are going to stay with my mom for Xmas. My brother and his kids will also be there.

We open presents on Christmas Eve. It has always been the tradition we did with my kids. It is how my parent did it with us as kids. We opened Christmas presents Christmas Eve, played until we fell asleep, and then woke up in the morning and had family time and a big breakfast. We never did the santa thing with my kids.

My brother and his wife open gifts "from santa" on Christmas morning. They want everyone to partake in their traditions. They say if we do our thing it will ruin Christmas for their kids. I said maybe we can do some gifts the night before and some in the morning as a compromise but they said that the kids will think it is weird that santa is bringing gifts so early. They are insisting that we all do the santa thing. That is just not going to happen. I'm not going to force my kids to pretend they believe in Santa. We have always taught them to not tell other that Santa is not real and just to say it isn't something they believe in.

My SIL is bitching to everyone. My mom is about to uninvite them. It was going to be the first Christmas where we all were going to be together but it is turning into a train wreck. As of now we will do our thing and they will do their thing and we will have Christmas breakfast together.
At least its SIL this time being an unreasonable bitch and not MIL, hahahaha
We open one gift on xmas eve and the rest xmas day. While the kids play the adults fix breakfast then we straighten up the house and the kids watch movies or play with their toys then we start making appetizers to munch on during the day and prepare dinner for later.
We were all raised to be polite well mannered kids and I've done the same with my children and my siblings have done the same. Our family members would never be mean and deliberately ruin xmas for kids that still believe in santa.
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LOL. ‘Tis the season!
Anonymous 8

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Anonymous 4 wrote: Thu Nov 21, 2019 10:20 am You say it's the 1st Christmas everyone would be together. That's really important to grandparents & often the opportunity may never come again (speaking from experience). If you really wanted it to happen, you would be more willing to compromise. Let your kids know that her kids still do Santa. Hold back a couple of gifts for them to open Xmas morning. If your kids know there's no Santa, then there's no harm in playing along ONE day a year. Especially if you know you are doing it not for your SIL, but for your parents.

Yes it sucks to be the side that gives & sucks it up to do what someone else wants. But I can tell you that when a grandparent gets very few chances to have everyone together it's pretty special & important. My grandmother had just 1 chance to have all her children & her grandchildren together for Thanksgiving. 1 person ruined it. 1 person destroyed my grandmother's dream & it was so hurtful to see. The chance never came again. You have the chance to be the bigger person, to do something to make the holiday work for the grandparents. It's worth thinking about others to make it happen.

But this is MC and it'll never happen & I'll be criticized for even suggesting it. Bash away ladies.
She is willing to compromise. She has stated repeatedly that she asked SIl to open some gifts in the evening for her tradition and open some Christmas morning to honor Sil's tradition...How much more compromising can she do. Ots a shame SIl osnt willing to.compromise and is hurting the grandparents
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Anonymous 4 wrote: Thu Nov 21, 2019 10:20 am You say it's the 1st Christmas everyone would be together. That's really important to grandparents & often the opportunity may never come again (speaking from experience). If you really wanted it to happen, you would be more willing to compromise. Let your kids know that her kids still do Santa. Hold back a couple of gifts for them to open Xmas morning. If your kids know there's no Santa, then there's no harm in playing along ONE day a year. Especially if you know you are doing it not for your SIL, but for your parents.

Yes it sucks to be the side that gives & sucks it up to do what someone else wants. But I can tell you that when a grandparent gets very few chances to have everyone together it's pretty special & important. My grandmother had just 1 chance to have all her children & her grandchildren together for Thanksgiving. 1 person ruined it. 1 person destroyed my grandmother's dream & it was so hurtful to see. The chance never came again. You have the chance to be the bigger person, to do something to make the holiday work for the grandparents. It's worth thinking about others to make it happen.

But this is MC and it'll never happen & I'll be criticized for even suggesting it. Bash away ladies.
I totally agree with you.
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jas wrote: Thu Nov 21, 2019 10:29 am
Anonymous 1 wrote: Thu Nov 21, 2019 10:12 am
jas wrote: Thu Nov 21, 2019 10:11 am Or you could just open everything Christmas morning. What's the big deal?
We aren't going to give up all of our traditions. I would be willing to compromise but not give up everything. Plus some of the gifts are specifically for that night.
All of your traditions? It's one. For the sake of little KIDS. Who is the adult here?
You can just tell she’s one of those people that’s annoying AF.
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So...why not tell the kids the gifts on Christmas Eve are from Aunt Jane or Grandma etc. then the ones on Christmas Day are from Santa. I’m not sure the issue—if your kids are old enough to not believe I. Santa why they wouldn’t be old enough to open presents in the morning instead.
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Anonymous 7 wrote: Thu Nov 21, 2019 1:25 pm
Anonymous 1 wrote: Thu Nov 21, 2019 9:46 am This year we are going to stay with my mom for Xmas. My brother and his kids will also be there.

We open presents on Christmas Eve. It has always been the tradition we did with my kids. It is how my parent did it with us as kids. We opened Christmas presents Christmas Eve, played until we fell asleep, and then woke up in the morning and had family time and a big breakfast. We never did the santa thing with my kids.

My brother and his wife open gifts "from santa" on Christmas morning. They want everyone to partake in their traditions. They say if we do our thing it will ruin Christmas for their kids. I said maybe we can do some gifts the night before and some in the morning as a compromise but they said that the kids will think it is weird that santa is bringing gifts so early. They are insisting that we all do the santa thing. That is just not going to happen. I'm not going to force my kids to pretend they believe in Santa. We have always taught them to not tell other that Santa is not real and just to say it isn't something they believe in.

My SIL is bitching to everyone. My mom is about to uninvite them. It was going to be the first Christmas where we all were going to be together but it is turning into a train wreck. As of now we will do our thing and they will do their thing and we will have Christmas breakfast together.
At least its SIL this time being an unreasonable bitch and not MIL, hahahaha
We open one gift on xmas eve and the rest xmas day. While the kids play the adults fix breakfast then we straighten up the house and the kids watch movies or play with their toys then we start making appetizers to munch on during the day and prepare dinner for later.
We were all raised to be polite well mannered kids and I've done the same with my children and my siblings have done the same. Our family members would never be mean and deliberately ruin xmas for kids that still believe in santa.
Op isnt ruining Santa for anyone....
Anonymous 9

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Any other day it would be we need to show kids that the world doesn't revolve around them. Today it's let all pretend Santa is real because the parents decided to start the Santa nonsense. OP, if you do this, you can count on things going completely their way from now on.
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