Struggling to keep a straight face

[Olioxenfree]

None of the other adults know what's going on. It's only the grandkids and me. No one else knows. It's one of the things only the younger ones gets.

"The adults were talking about it and trying to figure out who gets called what" not according to your post. And it isn't any less disrespectful just because it's done behind their backs.

They don't know why who gets what. Just that they call differen people different things.

It isn't any less disrespectful because they do it behind their backs. They should be calling everyone the same thing and my kids would be corrected for being so rude. I'm not raising my kids to think that's funny.

[Anonymous 5]

If I'm the aunt, I wouldn't care. And I'd lay money on this aunt not caring either.

But OP said that her niece and nephew WILL be calling new SIL "Aunt." So, if they don't think of her as an aunt, it is even more odd that they'd elect to call her "aunt". To me, this is very odd.

They dont recognize that woman has their Aunt. This
Is the woman that broke up their Aunt and Uncle and destroyed a family. Unvle too. As hard as people try you cant force filial relationships.

They would be using it as an insult though.

[CherryTreez]

We only use nicknames if the person requests it or they grew up with that nickname.

everyone has nicknames. My dad gives them to everyone. The ones the kids give people are cute and normally a mispronunciation of the name. I know my sister signs all her cards to the kids with her nickname.

[madfoodie]

We only use nicknames if the person requests it or they grew up with that nickname.

everyone has nicknames. My dad gives them to everyone. The ones the kids give people are cute and normally a mispronunciation of the name. I know my sister signs all her cards to the kids with her nickname.

My nickname was sticks but I had it since birth.

[Anonymous 5]

The kids can play. But they need to call people by the names they wish to be called by. To do it any other way would be very disrespectful.

[QuantumNursing]

"The adults were talking about it and trying to figure out who gets called what" not according to your post. And it isn't any less disrespectful just because it's done behind their backs.

They don't know why who gets what. Just that they call differen people different things.

It isn't any less disrespectful because they do it behind their backs. They should be calling everyone the same thing and my kids would be corrected for being so rude. I'm not raising my kids to think that's funny.

Why would they be called the same thing? Not all relationships are egual. I was closer to family members and we had nicknamed for each other. The family members I didn't like we're called Mrs. Lastname.....When are people going to learn you can't force relationships

[QuantumNursing]

"The adults were talking about it and trying to figure out who gets called what" not according to your post. And it isn't any less disrespectful just because it's done behind their backs.

They don't know why who gets what. Just that they call differen people different things.

It isn't any less disrespectful because they do it behind their backs. They should be calling everyone the same thing and my kids would be corrected for being so rude. I'm not raising my kids to think that's funny.

Why would they be called the same thing? Not all relationships are egual. I was closer to family members and we had nicknamed for each other. The family members I didn't like we're called Mrs. Lastname.....When are people going to learn you can't force relationships

[QuantumNursing]

The kids can play. But they need to call people by the names they wish to be called by. To do it any other way would be very disrespectful.

So they can call her Mrs. last name and call everyone else by their nicknames

[Anonymous 5]

To call any person by any other name than the one they wish to be called by would be ignorant. And if my kids did it (but they would never), they'd be in trouble.

But it appears this is a moot point anyway because OP said the kids & she will be calling SIL by the name she wishes..."Aunt." It's a win/win (sarcasm) for everyone. SIL gets what she wants by being called "Aunt." And OP/nieces/nephews get to continue to feel as if they are slighting her.

The kids can play. But they need to call people by the names they wish to be called by. To do it any other way would be very disrespectful.

So they can call her Mrs. last name and call everyone else by their nicknames

[QuantumNursing]

To call any person by any other name than the one they wish to be called by would be ignorant. And if my kids did it (but they would never), they'd be in trouble.

But it appears this is a moot point anyway because OP said the kids & she will be calling SIL by the name she wishes..."Aunt." It's a win/win (sarcasm) for everyone. SIL gets what she wants by being called "Aunt." And OP/nieces/nephews get to continue to feel as if they are slighting her.

The kids can play. But they need to call people by the names they wish to be called by. To do it any other way would be very disrespectful.

So they can call her Mrs. last name and call everyone else by their nicknames

Sorry but no. It's about the comfort of both people involved. People should not force filial titles to try and force intimate relationships. Just like when my Mil and Fil.insisted I call them mom and dad. It made me uncomfortable so I said no. I'm no way was I ride to that. 2 of my Aunts are 10 years younger me do you really think I call them anything but Susie?