DH was awarded full custody

Anonymous 1

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Honestly I am not really sure how I feel about it. Custody was 50/50 before but he decided to take it to court because BM works 6 days a week and the kids are at home all day doing nothing. BM doesnt want friends over there when she is working because there is no supervision for them and she doesnt like the kids leaving the house unless it is doing something with family.

Last summer the kids sat at her house doing nothing half the summer. I understand how that is boring BUT I dont think being a little bored is reason for the kids to not see their mom. That is their mother!

It also is different having them here all the time. I love my step kids dont get me wrong but it was nice to be kid free half the time. I know that is just me being selfish.

I really feel for BM. She is working hard to pay her bills and now she lost custody. The kids will go to her house every Wednesday (her day off) but that is it. The kids are happy to not have to go to BMs so I guess that is the one good thing out of it altho it is sad that they are happy about not seeing their mom.
Olioxenfree
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I mean, they weren't seeing her to begin with if she was working all of the time and they were sitting around alone.
Anonymous 1

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Olioxenfree wrote: Sat Jun 15, 2019 5:37 pm I mean, they weren't seeing her to begin with if she was working all of the time and they were sitting around alone.
They were still seeing her in the morning and after work. It wasnt like she was at work for 6 days straight. I am not saying it was ideal but now they will have a lot less time with her.

I am sure any mother would would be heartbroken if they lost custody of their kids because they are working to provide for them.
sheramom4
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If you disagreed with him then why support him through the court case? No is a complete sentence. Kids are bored? Oh well. I am sure there was housework to do. They could have also negotiated to attend camps, gotten summer jobs if they were old enough or asked about attending events with friends or going to a friend's home as long as they was supervision. Your husband could have suggested he get someone to take them before he went for custody and worked something out with mom despite her not liking some of those things.
Tons of options here.
Anonymous 1

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sheramom4 wrote: Sat Jun 15, 2019 5:49 pm If you disagreed with him then why support him through the court case? No is a complete sentence. Kids are bored? Oh well. I am sure there was housework to do. They could have also negotiated to attend camps, gotten summer jobs if they were old enough or asked about attending events with friends or going to a friend's home. Your husband could have suggested he get someone to take them before he went for custody.
Tons of options here.
I wasnt involved in the court case at all. I agree there were other options but this is what DH and the kids wanted. I am not going to tell my husband he cant have his kids in our home.
sheramom4
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Anonymous 1 wrote: Sat Jun 15, 2019 5:51 pm
sheramom4 wrote: Sat Jun 15, 2019 5:49 pm If you disagreed with him then why support him through the court case? No is a complete sentence. Kids are bored? Oh well. I am sure there was housework to do. They could have also negotiated to attend camps, gotten summer jobs if they were old enough or asked about attending events with friends or going to a friend's home. Your husband could have suggested he get someone to take them before he went for custody.
Tons of options here.
I wasnt involved in the court case at all. I agree there were other options but this is what DH and the kids wanted. I am not going to tell my husband he cant have his kids in our home.
No one said to tell him the kids couldn't be here but most married couples discuss things that impact the home and finances and give consideration to their partner. You could have said "Do as you wish but I will not support you in this and I will not do extra in the home because of a decision you want to make that I disagree with."
Anonymous 1

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sheramom4 wrote: Sat Jun 15, 2019 6:10 pm
Anonymous 1 wrote: Sat Jun 15, 2019 5:51 pm
sheramom4 wrote: Sat Jun 15, 2019 5:49 pm If you disagreed with him then why support him through the court case? No is a complete sentence. Kids are bored? Oh well. I am sure there was housework to do. They could have also negotiated to attend camps, gotten summer jobs if they were old enough or asked about attending events with friends or going to a friend's home. Your husband could have suggested he get someone to take them before he went for custody.
Tons of options here.
I wasnt involved in the court case at all. I agree there were other options but this is what DH and the kids wanted. I am not going to tell my husband he cant have his kids in our home.
No one said to tell him the kids couldn't be here but most married couples discuss things that impact the home and finances and give consideration to their partner. You could have said "Do as you wish but I will not support you in this and I will not do extra in the home because of a decision you want to make that I disagree with."
We did talk about it multiple times and he knows how I feel about it. He is doing what he feels is best for his kids.

He isnt expecting me to do any extra work.
sheramom4
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Anonymous 1 wrote: Sat Jun 15, 2019 6:12 pm
sheramom4 wrote: Sat Jun 15, 2019 6:10 pm
Anonymous 1 wrote: Sat Jun 15, 2019 5:51 pm

I wasnt involved in the court case at all. I agree there were other options but this is what DH and the kids wanted. I am not going to tell my husband he cant have his kids in our home.
No one said to tell him the kids couldn't be here but most married couples discuss things that impact the home and finances and give consideration to their partner. You could have said "Do as you wish but I will not support you in this and I will not do extra in the home because of a decision you want to make that I disagree with."
We did talk about it multiple times and he knows how I feel about it. He is doing what he feels is best for his kids.

He isnt expecting me to do any extra work.
Who watches them all day? Does he not work?
And I would be very upset if my partner disregarded my feelings on something so important.
Anonymous 1

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sheramom4 wrote: Sat Jun 15, 2019 6:14 pm
Anonymous 1 wrote: Sat Jun 15, 2019 6:12 pm
sheramom4 wrote: Sat Jun 15, 2019 6:10 pm

No one said to tell him the kids couldn't be here but most married couples discuss things that impact the home and finances and give consideration to their partner. You could have said "Do as you wish but I will not support you in this and I will not do extra in the home because of a decision you want to make that I disagree with."
We did talk about it multiple times and he knows how I feel about it. He is doing what he feels is best for his kids.

He isnt expecting me to do any extra work.
Who watches them all day? Does he not work?
And I would be very upset if my partner disregarded my feelings on something so important.
It is okay if we disagree. I am not going to fault him for doing what is best for his kids.

They are teens so if he is gone no one is really watching them, however I work more than DH does
silverdawn99
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I think I would be disgusted if my partner took his kids away from their mom just because they were bored. Shameful
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