I feel awful for judging her, but I am

[Anonymous 1]

My friend just got out of an abusive relationship in DECEMBER. She has moved on and had family Easter with this man and their kids. Too soon to have the kids together. Judging and I hate that about me right now

[RedBottoms]

I would judge too. She did not learn her lesson the first time

[highlandmum]

For me it depends on the age of the people. Younger people with young children too soon, older person with grown children not a big deal.

[Lotus]

It bothers me to read this because my first thought is [whether she can or can not] she must doubt her ability to stand on her own two feet.

[jas]

You know - this is no different than grieving. There is no one right way to do it. Is there some written rule about when to bring a guy you're dating around your kids? What's the proper time frame? 5 dates? 10 dates?

4 months is a long time to some - not enough to others. I don't know the circumstances as to how she got out of her relationship, but if she's moved on, she's moved on. And I'm not seeing the big deal about a dinner. Should she not have any new friends? Show her kids that not all relationships are fucked up?

[Anonymous 1]

For me it depends on the age of the people. Younger people with young children too soon, older person with grown children not a big deal.

Middle age with teen age children.

[Anonymous 1]

You know - this is no different than grieving. There is no one right way to do it. Is there some written rule about when to bring a guy you're dating around your kids? What's the proper time frame? 5 dates? 10 dates?

4 months is a long time to some - not enough to others. I don't know the circumstances as to how she got out of her relationship, but if she's moved on, she's moved on. And I'm not seeing the big deal about a dinner. Should she not have any new friends? Show her kids that not all relationships are fucked up?

So in about 5 years, she’s had an abusive marriage an abusive relationship and now a new relationship that she’s bringing around already. Plus these kids had rough beginnings (all adopted amazing kids)

[carterscutie85]

You know - this is no different than grieving. There is no one right way to do it. Is there some written rule about when to bring a guy you're dating around your kids? What's the proper time frame? 5 dates? 10 dates?

4 months is a long time to some - not enough to others. I don't know the circumstances as to how she got out of her relationship, but if she's moved on, she's moved on. And I'm not seeing the big deal about a dinner. Should she not have any new friends? Show her kids that not all relationships are fucked up?

I agree. I did not have kids with him but my longest relationship before DH, I was honestly over it long before I kicked him to the curb. It made moving on easier.

[Pjmm]

Is it too soon? Yes. But I think I understand it. She's hurting and needs a friend, love, a companion. It was Easter dinner together though not a marriage. I might say to her look I'm concerned you'll get hurt again so please be cautious. After that it's her business. Have you met the man yourself?

[Conweis]

You know - this is no different than grieving. There is no one right way to do it. Is there some written rule about when to bring a guy you're dating around your kids? What's the proper time frame? 5 dates? 10 dates?

4 months is a long time to some - not enough to others. I don't know the circumstances as to how she got out of her relationship, but if she's moved on, she's moved on. And I'm not seeing the big deal about a dinner. Should she not have any new friends? Show her kids that not all relationships are fucked up?

Plus, we do not know how kongbshe has known the man she is with now. Where they met? How they met? There are too many factors to judge this on.