WWYD If...

[Nonnie]

Your SD was accusing your SS of sexual assault? SS says it was consensual but she was the aggressor.

My husband and his ex wife had a son and a daughter together then adopted another daughter. SD who is accusing SS of sexual assault is not biologically related to her brother. They also did not all grow up in the same household, it's complicated. They were 14(sd) and almost 16(ss) at the time.

A few years ago, we were having a house warming party. That day, while we were getting the house ready for the party, we kept finding SD and SS acting oddly. First they were holding hands. Not that weird- they are very close even though they never lived together. Then we found him laying with his head in her lap, watching TV. It just seemed weirdly inappropriate. And it had come out of nowhere- it's not like they had always had some kind of flirtation. We made sure they were separated for the rest of the day-doing different jobs or hosting in different parts of the house.

We made sure they went to sleep that night in their own rooms- SD shared a room with her sister. My husband fell asleep on the couch watching TV, which is in the living room separating the two bedrooms.

He woke up early next morning and went to bed. When he got up an hour or so later, he found them spooning on the couch. Fully clothed, under a blanket. He woke them up, told them not to do that again and sent them to their rooms.

A few months later, SD's boyfriend's mom calls and says she's concerned about SD. Says she has spoken to SD's mom who won't speak to her. She says SD told her she is going into therapy and on medication because she's been having a hard time. Fighting at school, failing grades, inappropriate behavior with boys. SD has also been spreading random lies around the school and with her friends. Says this has been going on for over a year. It was all news to us- and DH stays very involved so he was shocked. Then, she says that her son (SD's boyfriend) got expelled from school for violence. He was looking for SS to fight him because SD says he raped her. That night, in our house. The school never called us because SS was not at school that day so it didn't involve us. But she thought we should know- she said BM knows and isn't telling anyone.

We spoke with BM and SS but SD would not speak to us at the time. SS says that SD pushed him into a closet and grabbed his crotch and said, "kiss me". So, he did, and they fooled around. He says they didn't have S*x. BM said she was going to the police but could not bring SD with her- didn't want to pull her kicking and screaming. We were under the impression BM was going by herself but then she never told us anything about it.

A few weeks later, BM and the mother of SD's boyfriend both told us that SD said it was not rape or assault, they just kissed and touched but it was consensual. Since then, they have visitation separately and are closely monitored any time they spend time together. Keep in mind, SD has been in therapy this whole time so it's not like anyone is ignoring the situation. But BM and SD won't talk to us about what happened or how SD is doing.

Years go by, SD is doing much better. Three weeks ago, SD got into a huge fight with her mom and moved out. She's been talking to DH more about what she's going through. When she moved out, into her grandmother's house, she told grandmother SS had assaulted her those years back. This time, she said SS had threatened her to keep quiet then touched her and made her give him a hand job. She still doesn't want to go to the police. SS still says it was consensual, that she was the aggressor, and also that nothing has ever happened since. SD has, over the years, asked to hang out with all of her siblings at once and even texted us to get SS's phone number (he is almost 18 and has his own apartment). Keep in mind, they have never lived together full time- like I said, it's complicated.

All of us are very upset and worried, obviously. I feel sick. Mom never went to the police. We were under the impression it was not true so we didn't go to the police. However, we were certain that something happened, we just thought it was consensual and while that wasn't okay, we didn't think we needed to call the police. Now we don't know what to think.

[Danesmommy1]

Obviously everyone needs therapy, but aside from that I'm not sure. It's clearly a fucked up case of Hillbilly He said, She said. Y'all might never know what really happened.

[Vegaswife2011]

What the f**k?

[Pjmm]

What the f**k?

That's my reaction. I'm at a loss to say anything here and that's unusual.

[CMrefugee]

God damn. I'm sorry but I've got nothing other than you all are going to need to seek some professional help. Yeesh.

[caustib]

How old was she when she was adopted? Is there any history of false accusations before then?

[eyes4ears]

The best thing I can say:

Thank God they are blood related.

[Guest]

How old was she when she was adopted? Is there any history of false accusations before then?

She was 2, he was 5.

No, she has never acused anyone else of raping or molesting her.

But she has lied about other things. Lots of things

As an update, her mom is now asking if he is going to be here the next time she visits.

He won't be. He's coming to visit when all of the girls in the house happen to be off doing other things.
Even if he were, there is no way he would have access to any females as they don't sleep alone and have me during the day.


But this is a shitty situation all around. I still don't know if my step son is a predator, or if my sd is lying to her counselors and everyone else. SD might have been raped and we don't know how or if to protect her or help her. And we have other children in the house.

[MistressMonster]

This right here. All kinds of messed up.

Obviously everyone needs therapy, but aside from that I'm not sure. It's clearly a fucked up case of Hillbilly He said, She said. Y'all might never know what really happened.

[Valentina327]

I hear banjos...