She's going to be scarred for life

Unread post Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:39 pm

Thats what another mommy group told me.

My 14 year old dd is graduating this year.I went to her honor roll ceremony two weeks ago.I was one of maybe 4 parents there in the group of a couple hundred students.It was a waste of time if im going to be honest...unorganized, loud kids,they simply read their names and that was it.I took an uber there and raced there.

They are having another ceremony tonight for some awards.I told dd a few days ago that I did not want to attend.I would rather work and make some money.She said okay.Her teachers are pressing me to come

Same way they pressed me to go to that honor roll reading.Im just not interested.I told dd that they'll put it in her backpack tommorow.

Im having money problems.Im stressed the f**k out.Dd just called me again asking about this award ceremony and im stressed the f**k out.I yelled at her..I said didnt we discuss this already so why the hell are you asking me AGAIN?!

I'm pretty sure I hurt her feelings but Im on edge ...im very irritated.I have money problems.I just dont want to go.I dont want to go pick her up and be angry that I have to take her and sit through a boring reading again.Im going to be angry and I'd rather not.Im going to her graduation on thursday and its 3 hours.I have no issues with that but I dont want to sit thru another award reading.

Am i a shit mom for feeling like this? My nerves are shot.Im just stressed out.I dont want to go.I want to be left alone tbh.

Unread post Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:43 pm

No. Stress stresses us out.
Just apologize to her, tell her the truth and tell her you love her.

Unread post Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:44 pm

Graduating from what? Middle school? If the two of you discussed it and she understands why you can't do it, that should be all there is to say. That said, is there no one else who could step in and help by being there for her if you can't?

Unread post Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:46 pm

I doubt she's graduating from high School at 14.

Unread post Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:47 pm

Diamepphyre wrote: ↑Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:44 pm Graduating from what? Middle school? If the two of you discussed it and she understands why you can't do it, that should be all there is to say. That said, is there no one else who could step in and help by being there for her if you can't?

This works too. My 14 year old had a graduation ceremony where they gave out awards. It just happened to be on my first day of class.
I couldn't go, but my parents went.

Unread post Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:47 pm

Of course her feelings are hurt. First thing you need to do is apologize to your daughter for yelling at her. Don't make excuses when you do it because she didn't do anything wrong.

I'm sorry you're stressed out. Please don't let that stop you from letting your daughter know that you are proud of her and celebrate her successes.

Unread post Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:55 pm

She's graduating from the 8th grade.

I dont get the hoopla with this i understand its a milestone but its not like kids have a choice...its 8th F***ing grade

Now highschool where they can drop out if they want

If they finish thats an accomplishment worth celebrating imo.

I do plan on celebrating 8th grade with her..i will buy ballons etc. And take her out for lunch but meh...

Unread post Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:57 pm

Diamepphyre wrote: ↑Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:44 pm Graduating from what? Middle school? If the two of you discussed it and she understands why you can't do it, that should be all there is to say. That said, is there no one else who could step in and help by being there for her if you can't?

No i am a single mom.I do it all.Im always there for her but I just dont want to do this one thing.I deliver food and now is when you make money.I have bills,expenses etc.I can not afford to skip a night's pay.

Unread post Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:59 pm

Dylexsmommy wrote: ↑Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:43 pm No. Stress stresses us out.
Just apologize to her, tell her the truth and tell her you love her.

Yup. This.

Unread post Mon Jun 17, 2019 5:02 pm

Well, of course, her feelings are hurt. The kid is 14 her feelings are going to hurt anyway about something.

If I were you, I would start with telling her that I am sorry. Sorry that I was short tempered, but I honestly can not afford to miss work. Financially I have to be at work. It doesn't mean that I don't love you, or support you, it means that I need the money to take of you.

She's going to be scarred for life

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